rHFSH TsEOEYOSCH. CHUE UELTEFSCH MAVCHY
"NPTSOP MY EZP CHETOKHFSh, EUMY PO UBN OE RYYEF, OE ЪCHPOIF, OE IPYUEF PVEBFSHUS?"
dPVTSCHK DEOSH, rTELTBUOBS oEOBBLPNLB!
with OE RYUBMB chBN HCE FTY NEUSGB. bb ffp chtense s chemb reteryulh, dpvbchymb nopzp nbfetybmpch o ubkf y uekyubu vhdh chbu rpfiiposhlh u oyny komblpnyfsh.
b DMS OBUBMB RBTH PVYASCHMEOYK:
1) about UBKFE RPSCHYMUS GEMSCHK OPCHSHCHK VMPL. ON RPCHSEJO LPOUKHMSHFBGYY X NEOS Y PVTBEEOYA U CHPRTPUBNY.
CHUE RTBCHYMB PVTBEEOIS LP NOE RB RPNPESHA, CHYDSCH NPYI PFCHEFPCH Y URPUPVPCH OBDBFSH NOE CHPRTPU NPTsOP RPUNPFTEFSH ABOUT UFTBOYUL: ъBDBFSH CHPRTPU.
chshch NPTSEFE RTPUUEUFSH RPDTPVOEE P CHIDBI MYUOPK LPOUKHMSHFBGYY, VEURMBFOK Y RMBFOPC, B FBLTS RPUNPFTEFSH PFCHEFSHCH ABOUT CHPRTPUSCH RP LPOUKHMSHFBHYSN.
Chuen, LFP NOE RYUBM, OP RPLB OE DPTsDBMUS NPEZP PFCHEFB, UPCHEFHA CHPURPMSh'PCHBFSHUS NPEK LPOUKHMSHFBGYEK. VSCCHBEF, YuFP RYUSHNB NPZHF ЪBFETSFSSHUS, BCHBY CHPRTPUSCH Y ЪBSCHLY, ЪBRMOEOOSCHE YuETEЪ UBKF, CHUEZDB VHDHF X NEOS.
2) MEFPN OEULPMSHLP NPYI UFBFEK VSCHMY PRHVMYLPCHBOSHCH H 5 OPNET TSHTOBMB "MAVYNBS: UELTEFSHCH CHDPIOPCHEOYS".
b EEI H TBEME TSKHTOBMB "khZPMPL YUYFBFEMS" chshch NPTSEFE RTPUEUFSH PFCHEF ABOUT CHPRTPU "rPYUENKh LPZDB ABOUT UETDGE UCHEF, UMEFBAFUS ABOUT OEZP CHPCHUE OE FE?" Y NPK RPDTPVOSHCHK PFCHEF P FPN, UFP RTYCHMELBEF CH TSYOSH TSEOEYOSCH RMPIYI NHTSYUYO.
NS RPZPCHPTYN P UFTENMEOYY YDEBMYYYTPCHBFSH NHTSYUYO, P NEYUFBFEMSHOPUFY, TSEMBOYY IPTPYYI PFOPEYOYK, VEY PVYD Y RTEDBFEMSHUFCHB. y RPYUENKh FBLYN DECHHYLBN CHUFTEYUBAFUS YUBUFP ZTKHVSHCHE, BZTEUUYCHOSCHE NHTSYUOSCH?
oh, PYASCHMEOYS BLPOYUEOSCH :)
b FERESH L FENE UEZPDOSYOEZP CHSHCHRHULP.
with RPMHYUBA NOPZP CHPRTPPUCH P FPN, LBL NPTsOP PRTEDEMIFSH, UFP NHTSYUOB HCE OE CHETOIFUS RPUME FPZP, LBL HYYIM .
UEZPDOS S IPYUKH RTYCHEUFY chBN TEBMSHOSHCHK RTYNET, LPZDB NHTSYUOYOE PFOPIEOYS OE OHTSOSCH Y SO OE UPVYTBEFUS ChPCHTBEBFShUS.
LUFBFY, LFB YUFPTYS UFPYF YЪ 4-I RYUEN - DCHHI RYUEN DECHHYLY Y DCHHI NPYI RYUEN U LPNNEOFBTYSNY Y PVYASUOEOYSNNY.
h RETCHPN NPЈN RYUSHNE chshch RTPUFЈFE P FPN, RPYUENKH OELPFPTSCHI NHTSUYO CHPPVEE OEMSHЪS CHPCHTBEBFSH.
i HЪOBEFE YUFPTYA PDOPK DECHHYLY, LPFPTBS UNPZMB CHETOHFSH NHTSYUYOH, LPFPTSCHK EЈ OE MAVYM, Y L YUENKH LFP RTYCHEMP DBMSHYE.
b PE CHFPTPN RYUSHNE RTPUFЈFE P FPN, LBLYE DECHKHYLY RTYCHMELBAF CH UCHPA TSYOSH TSEOBFSHCHI NHTSYUYO Y RPYUENKH YFP RTPYUIPDYF.
b FBLTSE, RPKNЈFE, LBL OBYB RTYCHSBOOPUFSH Y KHNEOYE MAVIFSH CHMYSAF OB FP, LBLPK NKHTSYUYOB OBN CHUFTEFYFUS CH TSOYOY.
xCHETEOB, UFP LFB YUFPTYS RPNPTSEF chBN MKHYUYE RPOYNBFSH NHTSYUYO, B FBLTS OBHYUYF RTBCHYMSHOP UFTPIYFSH PFOPIEOYS, LPZDB chshchCHNEUFE.
uFPVSHCH OE RTYIPDYMPUSH EZP CHP-CHTBEBFSH :)
OH, CHUJ, B FERETSCH L CHSHCHURHULH:)
P.S. bB IPTPYYE UVBFSHY Y UPCHEFSCH, UPRETETSYCHBOYE Y RPNPESH, TSEMBOYE RPNPYUSH chBN UFTPIYFSH YULTEOOOYE Y UYUBUFMYCHSCHE CHBYNPPFOPYEOIS, chshch NPTSEFE RPVMBZPDBTYFSH BCHFPTB OE FPMSHLP NPTBMSHOP, OP Y NBFETYIBMSHOP :)
"NPTSOP MY EZP CHETOKHFSh, EUMY PO UBN OE RYYEF, OE ЪCHPOIF, OE IPYUEF PVEBFSHUS?"
RYUSHNP U CHPRTPPUPN:
'DTBCHUFCHKFE, ELBFETYOB! x ChBU UBNEYUBFEMSHOSHCHE UVBFSHY. OBDEAUSH, VMBZPDBTS YN, S CHUFBOKH ABOUT OPZY. RETEUFBOKH TECHEFSH Y OBJUOKH TSYFSH.
NPS UIFHBGYS FBLCHB. pF NEOS HYYEM NHTSYUYOB, U LPFPTSHCHN NShCH VSHMY CHNEUFE 6 MEF. NSHCHOE TSYMY CHNEUFE. with OE PZTBOYUYCHBMB EZP UCHPPVDH. FP X NEOS, FP X OEZP. with DBCE OE ЪBNEFYMB, LBL RTPMEFEMY LFY ZPDSHCH. y UFBMB OEFETREMYCHB CH PTSYDBOYY FPZP, UFP NSCH DPMTSOSCH TSYFSH CHNEUFE, UFP HCE RPTB. OP, CHYDYNP, FBL TEYYMB FPMSHLP S.
LBL S UEKYUBU RPOINBA, BY CHUE CHTENS PFFSZYCHBM FFPF NPNEOF. and CHUE VSCHMP RTBCHDB IPTPYP. IPFS S OBEZP Y DBCHYMB, OP YuHFSH-YUHFSH Y RPUMEDOEE CHTENS. b RPFPN S HOBMB, UFP RBTBMMEMSHOP X OEZP UFPMSHLP TSEOEIO ... Y UFP PO CHUE UFP CHTENS TSIM UCHPEK TSIYOSHA.
with FPMSHLP OEDBCHOP PRTBCHYMBUSH. with RPOINBA EZP UFTBI RETED UPDBOYEN WENSHY. with OBYMB CH UEVE UYMSCH Y RTPUFIMB EZP. OE BOBA FPMSHLP, DP LPOGB MY ... CHEDSH PO RTPRBM YOE ЪCHPOYF NOE CHPPVEE, LBL VHDFP S RHUFPE NEUFP. y ZPCHPTYF, YuFP SOE YNEMB RTBCHP LPRBFSHUS CH EZP MYUOPK TSYOYOY Y UBNB CHUE YURPTFIMB. with PLBMBUSH CHYOPCHBFPK. OPOE NPZMB TSE S CHUA TSYOSH TSYFSH CH TP-PCHSHCHI PYULBI. OP, LPOEYUOP, FBLPZP S OE PTSYDBMB.
s 1.5 NEUSGB ENH OBCHBOYCHBMB Y HNPMSMB RTYEIIBFSH IPFS OB NYOHFH. OP.. HCE 1.5 NEUSGB S HYMB YЪ EZP TSOYOY OE RYYKH, OE ЪCHPOA. and RSHCHFBAUSH TSYFSH VEH OEZP. with VSC PYUEOSH IPFEMB VSHCHFSH CHNEUFE U OIN, F.L CHUE EEE UIMSHOP EZP MAVMA. th ChSCH ZPCHPTYFE, YuFP LFP ChPЪNPTSOP.
vMBZPDBTS CHBYEK UFBFSE S FFP RPOSMB. OP RPYUENKh-FP LBCEFUS, UFP LFP RPDIPDYF RPD CHUEI, OP FPMSHL OE LOENH, CHEDSH PO PUPVEOOSHK, YULMAYUEOYE Y RTBCHYM.
y EEE NHYUYF FP, YuFP CHUE ZPCHPTSF, YuFP Yuempchel OILPZDB OE YЪNEOYFUS Y UFP CHUE RPCHFPTYFUS. b BYuEN NOE FBLPK NKhTsyuyob... S ffp rpoinba. OP UETDGH OE RTYLBTSEYSH. uFP DEMBFS? RPNPZYFE RPTSBMHKUFB. NOE 26, ENH 41. x OEZP OEF OH TSEOSCH, OH DEFEK.
pFCHEF ELBFETYOSCH JMYLPR:
'DTBCHUFCHKFE, mBTYUB.
DMS FPZP, YUFPVSH VSHCHFSH CHNEUFE, OE PVSEBFEMSHOP CHNEUFE TSYFSH. MADY UFTPSF PFOPIEOYS Y TBUUFPSOYY, Y YOPZDB LFP RPMHYUBEFUS OBNOPOZP MKHYUYE.
FP PE-RETCHSHI.
b ChP-CHFPTSCHI. L UETDGH CHUE RTPYUIPDSEEE U CHBNY OE YNEEF OILBLPZP PFOPIEOYS.
FP RTPUFP CHBIE IPYUKH. yobyuye zpyjn.
with IPYUKH VSHCHFSh U FPVPK. i IPFSh FSH FTEUOY.
yЪCHYOSAUSH ЪB ZTHVPE CHSHCHTBTSEOYE, OP LFP FBL.
FP OE MAVPCHSH, B CEMBOYE HDETTSBFSh, PDETSYNPUFSH, OBCHSYUYCHPUFSH. uFP IPFIFE, OP OE MAVPCHSH.
FP, UFP CHSH DP FPZP READING TSYMY CH TP-PCHSHCHI PYULBI, RTELTBUOP RPLB-SCHCHBEF FFP. chshch OE IPFEMI EZP CHYDEFSH FBLIN, LBLPK PO EUFSH.
rTYDHNBMY UEVE LBLPC-FP LTBUICHSHCHK PVTB. and CHUE.
b CHBYE RPCHEDEOYE RTY TBUUFBCHBOY MYYOYK TB RPLBBSCHCHBEF, YUFP chshch IPFEMY VSHCHFSH U OIN OEUNPFTS OY ABOUT UFP, DBCE EUMY CHSH ENH VETBBMYUOSCH YMY OERTYSFOSHCH.
ChSCH HYMY U ZPMPPCHPK CH PFOPIOEOYS Y RPMOPUFSHA UPUTEDPFPYUYMYUSH ABOUT OEN.
chshch hchsmy ch ojn.
ULBCYFE:
PO - UNSCHUM CHBYEK TSOYOY?
uENSHS - UNSHUM CHBYEK TSOYOY, PFOPIEOYS, MAVINSCHK YUEMPCHEL, DEFI?
eUMY DB, FP CHOYNBFEMSHOP RTPUYFBKFE DCHE UMEDHAEYE UFBFSHY:
iFBL, mBTYUB. UBNPE ZMBCHOPE - LFP CHBYB PZTPNOBS ЪBCHYUYNPUFSH PF PFOPIEOYK, YNEOOP RPFPNKh CHSH Y RMBYUEFE.
according to ULBBM UFP-FP FBL, LBL CHBN IPYUEFUS, - CHSH TBDHEFEUSH. uFP-FP UDEMBM YMY ULBBM OE FBL - CHUE, DMS CBU UFTEUU, CHSH PVITSBEFEUSH.
sFP MAHPS?
FP IBCHYUYNPUFSH PF YuEMPCHELB - YOE VPMEE.
b U BCHYUYNPUFSHHA OBDP TBVPFBFSh.
MAVPCHSH DBEF YuEMPCHELH TBDPUFSH, RTPUFP PF FPZP, UFP LFPF YuEMPCHEL ZDE-FP EUFSH CH NYTE. th OE CHBTsOP - TSDPN PO U FPVPK YMY OEF.
MAVPCHSH DBEF YuEMPCHELH UIMSHCH TSYFSH, FCHPTYFSH, UFP DEMBFSH DMS NYTB Y DTHZYI MADEK, BOE FPMSHLP UIDEFSH Y RMBLBFSH P UEVE: "LPZDB CE PO RTYDEF"
fBL YuFP X hBU OE MAVPCHSH. i UETDGH RTYLBSCCHBFSH RPFPNKH OE PVSEBFEMSHOP.
b PF ЪBCHYUYNPUFY FBLPK YЪVBCHYFUS CHRPMOE TEBMSHOP. NPCCF VSFSH, LPDB CHIST YUVBCHYFUESH PF LFPPZP OBCHYUYCHPUPZP TEMBYSP OBSFSHUCHPSP, CHRCH HTYDYFE EZP OE YOUTE TPUTYSKE PULY YMMAYK YY YUTBYSPE PULY PVYDY UFBIB RPFETSFSH, BABMSHOP.
th OE ZHBLF, UFP PO RPOTBCHYFUS CHBN TEBMSHOSHCHK, YuFP chshch ЪBIPFIFE VSHCHFSH U OIN.
LTBFLP P FPN, LBL UEVS CHEUFY, YUYFBKFE CH NPEK UVBFSE: "YURSHCHFBOYE MAVPCHSHHA"
eUMY VHDHF LPOLTEFOSHCHE CHPRTPUSCH - RYYYFE.
obdeaush, UFP X hBU RPMHYUYFUS EZP PFRHUFYFSH Y RPOSFSH, YUFP PFOPIOEOYK U YUEMPCHELPN, LPFPTPNH chshch OE OHTSOSCH, CHUE TBCHOP OE RPMHYUBFUS, DBTSE EUMY PO Y CHETOEFUS.
FETREOIS chbn, get rid of RETENEO Y tbdpufy tsyoy!
CHUEZP chBN UBNPZP uchEFMPZP!
lBFETYOB JMYLPR,
BCHFPT Y CHEDHABS RTPELFB
www.secretylubvi.com
RYUSHNP CHFPTPE:
'DTBCHUFCHKFE, ELBFETYOB. URBUYVP UFP PFCHEFYMY! pYUEOSH FSTCEMP UMSCHYBFSH RTBCHDH Y P UEVE, UFP OE MAVMA. th P OEN, UFP OE OKHTSOB. fBL CHUE ZMKhRP Y UFPMShLP MEF UEVS Yuen-FP FEYYFSH... op VKhDKh CHUFBCHBFSH. x NEOS ICHBFIF HUGE! eEE TB URBUYVP. b RP RPCHPDH UFBFSHY, LPOEYUOP TBNEEBKFE. eUMY POB EEE NPTSEF LPNKh-FP RPNPYUSH, FP LFP, CHPPVEE, JDPTPCHP.
P.S. with UEKYUBU DPRYUBMB CHBN PFCHEF, RETEYUYFBMB, Y RPOSMB... b
chFPTPK PFCHEF lBFETYOSCH zhMYLPR:
'DTBCHUFCHKFE, mBTYUB.
CHSH MAVIFE, OP OE RTBCHIMSHOP. LFY YUKHCHUFCHB, LPOEYUOP, UMPTsOP OBCHBFSH MAVPCHSHHA. with VSC ULBBMB, UFP LFP FPMSHLP RETCHSHCHK LMBUU MAVCHY, B NPTCEF DBTSE Y RPDZPFCHYFEMSHOSHCHK.
at OEZP CHUYE OBJOBEFUS.
rPFPPNH HYUFEUSH MAVIFSH RTBCHYMSHOP - MEZLP, UCHPVPDOP, YULTEOOOE, RTPUFP, VE FTEVPCHBOYK Y PTSYDBOIK, VE OBDETSD Y CHPURPNYOBOYK.
MAVYFSH UEKYUBU.
with FPCE LFPNH HYUKHUSH. DP UYI RPT.
th X NEOS FPCE VSCCHBAF PYYVLY, OP UBNPE ZMBCHOPE - HVTBFSH LFKH CHPMOKH OBCHSYUYCHPUFY, PDETSYNPUFY, CEMBOYS.
fPZDB LFP VHDEF VPMEE CHSHCHUPLYK HTPCHEOSH MAVCHY, VPMEE YUYUFSHKK, VPMEE YULTEOOIK.
i FPZDB chbn VKhDEF OBNOPOZP MEZUE UFTPYFSH PFOPIEOYS, RPOYNBFSH, RTPEBFSh.
th FPZDB chshch UFBOEFE OKHTSOSCH, FBL LBL OE VKhDEFE bb OEZP GERMSFUS.
ZMBCHOPE - CHSC HCE YDEFE RP DPTTCLE TBCHYFYS MAVCHY.
chshch TBVPFBEFE OBD UPVPK, UVBTBFEUSH.
CHBY YUHCHUFCHB UEKYUBU - FFP LZPYUFYUEULBS MAVPCSH. h LPFPTPK UMYYLPN NOPZP FROM Y UMYYLPN NBMP OBUFPSEEK MAVCHY.
in HDEFE HYUYFSHUS MAVIFSH - LFPZP ьZPIЪNB CH CHBYI YUKHCHUFCHBI VHDEF UVBOPCHYFSHUS CHUE NEOSHIE.
pYUEOSH TBDB, YuFP chshch NOPZPE RPOSMY.
lPOEYUOP, chshch OOHTSOSCHOE RPFPNKH, UFP OE MAVIFE, B RPFPNKh, YUFP CHBYB MAVPCHSH EEE UMYYLPN OBUSHCHEEOB TSEMBOISNY, NHYUEOYSNY, FETBOISNY Y EZP, Y UEVS.
at OEK OECHPЪNPTSOP RPUFTPIFSH DPMZYE Y UYUBUFMYCHSCHE PFOPIEOYS.
y YNEOOP RPFPNKh chshch RTYCHMELBEFE CH UCHPA TSYOSH NHTSYUYO, LPFPTSHCHE OYUEZP chbn OE DPMTSOSHCH.
rPFPNH YuFP chshch OE NPCEFE PF OYI OYYUEZP FTEVPCHBFSH, NPTCEFE FPMSHLP UPMBYBFSHUS OB YI HUMPCHYS, HYUIFSHUS RTYOYNBFSH YI FBLYNY, LBL EUFSH, RTPEE PFOPUYFSHUS L CHBYYN PFOPEOYSN.
yNEOOP RPFPNKh FBLYE RTYCHSKYUYCHSHCHE DECHKHYLY YUBUFP CHMAVMSAFUS CH TSEOBFSCHI NHTSYUYO.
CHEDSH YI OE RPFETBEYSH, YNY OE RPLPNBODHEYSH.
yNOE ULBTSEYSH: IPYUH CHUEZDB VSHCHFSH U FPVPK, RPUFHRBC FBL, LBL WITH IPYUKH ...
CHEDSH X OEZP WENSHS.
i FPZDB RTPUFP RTYIPDYFSHUS TsDBFSH, GEOYFSH FP, UFP EUFSH Y RTPUFP MAVIFSh, VEI TSEMBOIS VSHCHFSH CHNEUFE, VEI RMBOPC P VHDKHEEN, VEI FTEVPCHBOIK.
uFPVSC H LFH UYFKHBGYA OE RPRBDBFSH, YUFPVSC RTCHMEYUSH CH UCHPA TSYOSH NHTSYUYOH, LPFPTPNKH OHTSOSCH SC Y PFOPIEOYS U chBNY, - HYUYFEUSH MAVYFSH RTPUFP Y MEZLP.
h FPC LOYTSEYULE, LPFPTHA S chBN RTYUMBMB, EUFSH NOPZP YOFETEUOSCHI YUFPTYK Y RTYNETCH, LBL LFP UDEMBFSH.
rTPYUFYFE EY CHOYNBFEMSHOP
rPDRYUBFSHUS ABOUT TBUUSCHMPYULKH "RHFSH TsEOEYOSCH. CHUE UELTEFSHCH MAVCHY" NPTsOP ЪDEUSH:
http://secretylubvi.com/listy.php
'DEUSH TSE chshch OBKDEFE RPDTPVOPE PRYUBOYE TBUUSCHMPYULY Y ZHPTNKH RPDRYULY.
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rTBCHYMB RETEREYUBFLY:
RETEREYUBFLB NPYI UVBFEK TBTEYBEFUS Y RTYCHEFUFCHHEFUS! pVSBFEMSHOPE HUMPCHYE - UPITBOEOYE NPPEZP BCHFPTULPZP VMPLB U TBVPFBAEEK UUSCHMPYULPK, CHEDHEEK ABOUT ZMBCHOKHA UFTBOYULKH NPEPZP UBKFB.
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vHDH TBDB CHUFTEFYFSHUS U chBNY ABOUT UFTBOYULBI NPEK TBUUSCHMLY!
tsemba chbn hdbyuy y mavchy!
lBFETYOB JMYLPR
Today you are sure that you are doing everything right. I am convinced that people like you do not leave. You have no doubt that he is yours forever, the only one in the world who is able to listen, understand, sympathize, reassure, support, protect. It's today, and tomorrow... he can leave.
Marriage is a long voyage in a cramped cabin. And it's natural that nerves sometimes fail.
Maybe the reason was a banal trifle - finding out who the real Winner of Eurovision 2011 is, or discussing the family budget, but now - the man left. Just don't panic! Could it be that you no longer need it? Maybe you are just not yet able to understand that his departure is yours. Take a breath, think while there is time. But, if there is still something to fight for, then remember that, most likely, you will have a chance to fix everything. Because husbands most often come back.
After his departure, you "tear your hair" and are tormented by questions:
- why did this happen to me?
- Is he better with her than with me?
- will he come back or not?
Why did he leave? It is possible and necessary to analyze your life with him, look for the reasons in yourself, in him, in your own ... Such an analysis will not hurt. Sooner or later, life makes everyone look back at the past years, experience the bitter feeling of parting with youth, with love. There is a need to rethink your priorities.
Comment on the article "Husband left. Will he return or not?"
“You won’t enter the same river twice” ... I have a situation, but I want my husband to take into account only with my daughter. All that happened in the past, I can’t be just his wife, I want everything to be honest. Just in the future I can make another man's happiness...
If it doesn’t work out, then let me exhaust happiness in this world, it’s all the same that it’s useless to renew it ... this is not the right person, not mine ...
To live on an animal habit, to have sex without respect, and pity, in principle, I could, but I don’t want to lie to myself.
or return or not: 50% to 50%.
02/19/2011 20:18:00, sympathizerTotal 8 messages .
More on the topic "Husband left. Will he return or not?":
I'm fine. That is, against the background of how it happens with others, it’s good, but in general it’s bad. Every day someone gets divorced, I'm not original. And the man who initiated the breakup is not God knows what a rarity. And children, even small and very, very cute, cease to interest their fathers - and this is not news, it happens. And when compared with what could be - everything is fine. I have my own apartment, I don’t have to go anywhere and re-create life. In September, I will go to work, where they are waiting for me ...
Do you know cases when a husband, having left the family out of great love, after some time returned back, prayed for forgiveness, swore eternal love, etc., that they still owe money there. The main thing is not whether he will return or not. And so that the abandoned wife does not live to wait.
The husband begged to return, promised to change. These attempts - to change - lasted about six months. Then it all started again. Only they were from the groom, these children. My husband left for a woman with 2 children from different men who bore him 3 sons.
Last night, after the children returned from the camp, the festive dinner and the departure of the soup, the children said that dad suggested that they go to the cinema on the weekend "four of them, along with his new aunt, because he loves her very much, soon they will live together, and he wants to introduce them to each other" O_O The children refused with the words "the four of us want to go only with you and mom", the soup did not insist ... The children "want to see dad, not dad in the company of another aunt", as they told me explained your answer... I...
Good day to all! Teach the mind to reason. I am married (by status), my son is 4 years old. The husband is constantly on business trips, he practically never happens at home, and on top of everything else, he has a "she". She appeared a long time ago, almost three years ago, when my relationship with my husband was on the verge of a divorce. But then he allegedly changed his mind, decided that the family was more important and we began to live together again. Then I did not yet know about her presence, I guessed, but I constantly drove thoughts away from me. And then by chance, while cleaning, I found ... Section: Wife and husband (husband said that he had lost feelings for me and went to another). Return to yourself, start any, seriously, even the most stupid hobby (from shaping to cross-stitching), this will help you forget about what is bad for a while, but only necessarily ...
The husband left. Will he return or not? I want my ex back, please help! IMHO, after parting it is impossible to return the former, you can only start over, repeat (slightly with others). In this case, you don’t need to try to return what is no longer there.
There are many questions for the beautiful half of humanity, to which they are looking for answers and cannot find. Girlfriends share their secrets among themselves, just like daughters tell their mothers "secret" information about their personal lives. After all, the relationship between a man and a woman is something special and fascinating.
If a woman turns to a specialist, then it is likely that 99% will hear the phrase that she does not need to delve into what others tell her, otherwise she will do a bunch of stupid things and make a lot of mistakes. But how should a woman behave in a situation where at first the man leaves and then returns. How can she understand the logic of his actions and actions? Let's take a look at the most popular questions.
How often do men return to an ex-woman?
Based statistics- more than 50% of men returned at least once after leaving their woman. Why so often men, having decided on desperate measures, seek to turn everything back? Several reasons can be listed here. First, and perhaps most importantly, they realized how wrong they were. The second reason is that they are tormented by nostalgia, which in reality is just a force of habit. A man will repeatedly think about his ex-woman, especially in the first two to three months. He will find common pictures, gifts from his beloved, or a memory in his head. And he will scroll through them over and over again, remembering and torturing himself more and more.
Psychology of men who will return
To Man left, he must have a good reason, just break off relations, pack up and leave the woman with whom he lived side by side for many years, this is very difficult in terms of morality. If a man is looking for a reason to leave his woman, then he is morally weak, he cannot decide whether to stay or it would be better to break off the relationship.
He has permanent doubts, he is in the middle of the bridge and does not know which way he should go. Such men are indecisive and irresponsible, they will try with all their might to find a reason for a scandal, in order to once again find out that the woman does not suit him, and leave the apartment picturesquely along with things.
Some people might hate of people, someone does not understand them, but when you have the same situation, you understand how wrong you were from the outside. After all, there is nothing more difficult than to understand what you want, who you want and where you want to go.
Psychology of men who are unlikely to return
Not returned men who have a solid character, a clear goal in front of them. They do not return to those women who cheated on a man or caused very severe pain. Men appreciate when there is peace, tranquility and happiness in the family, because where, if not here, can they take a break from work and people, see their loved ones and please them?
It cannot be said here that everything depends on . A more likely truth would be the coincidence of all factors that, when combined, help a man make his decision - whether to return or not.
Psychology of men who will never return
Will not return men who followed the logic before the break - "I said - I did", who make decisions quickly, and do not spend a lot of time thinking about the consequences, they just take it and do it. Such a man has a solid and steel character and he knows what he wants. And even if he later regrets a thousand times that he did just that, but no one will know or notice this.
If a man found a new girl or woman, with whom he began to develop a trusting relationship, with whom he feels like a king, and she is a queen, where caring for each other and love comes first in a relationship, then what would be the point of a man returning to his former family?
Influence of reasons for leaving on the likelihood of a man returning
What already mentioned earlier in the text, the reason for leaving is one of the most important factors in breaking up a relationship. If a faithful and loving wife will be waiting for a man at home, who will not heavily burden her husband’s house for nothing, then why should a man leave? The male sex is famous for its habits, in other words, if a man is satisfied with everything, then what is the point of ruining everything and going into the unknown?
If Man left after a serious quarrel in the heat of anger, that is, there is a high probability that he will return when he cools down. A person has such a temperament and such a psychology of thinking. He needs to take a walk in the fresh air, think about everything, calm down, and only then can he return home.
A family in which there is a person with alcohol dependence has a very hard time - physically, socially, emotionally and mentally. A drinking man ceases to be a "getter", becomes unable to bear responsibility for himself and his family. A drinking child, among other things, can make his parents suffer helplessly, not knowing how and with what to help. But the worst thing is when a drinking mother in a family is not only anxiety, worries and problems of a different nature. A woman with an addiction to alcohol becomes a threat to the health and even the life of her child.
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Harm expected and already done
If a mother drinks, her child suffers in any case, even if she does not inflict physical injury on him. The most vulnerable in this regard are young children, who often do not understand what is happening to their mother, why she smells bad, and kisses and hugs are replaced by screams and slaps. Kids every day watch the degradation of the closest and most beloved person, the one who should be their example and protection. Naturally, this cannot but affect their psyche.
However, unborn children are even more vulnerable to the problems of a drinking mother. A woman who drank alcoholic beverages during pregnancy can give birth to an immunocompromised baby suffering from:
- congenital physical pathologies;
- susceptibility to various diseases;
- mental disorders;
- developmental deviations.
Before even being born into the world, the little man is already suffering from the fact that his mother drinks. Thus begins a ruined childhood, and perhaps a whole life.
Obviously, little children cannot make any effort to get their mother to stop drinking. But the kids gradually grow up and become teenagers, who, due to immaturity, are still not able to do anything to really help their mother, but they can already have some influence on her. Teenagers can already be expected to behave correctly in dealing with an alcoholic, so it falls on their shoulders to take care of a parent in a state of a hangover and the first attempts to persuade her to stop drinking and begin treatment.
Our regular reader shared an effective method that saved her husband from ALCOHOLISM. It seemed that nothing would help, there were several codings, treatment at the dispensary, nothing helped. An effective method recommended by Elena Malysheva helped. ACTIVE METHOD
Forced to grow up early
Children in the family of an alcoholic grow up quickly - from the age of 10-11 they begin to learn the simple science of not provoking a drunken mother to aggression, so as not to fall under a hot hand, and also how to help her if necessary. It is important for such children to learn the two most important rules:
- do not give in to requests to bring a drink;
- do not take full responsibility.
Emotionally vulnerable children from a family where the mother drinks every day often become hostages to the manipulative art of the drunkard. An alcoholic mother easily manages to instill in them a sense of guilt for her condition, to frighten them with their own death if she does not get alcohol to “continue the banquet”, to accuse them of insensitivity. It is extremely important that children do not succumb to this blackmail, as each new drink makes the existing problem even more serious.
As for responsibility, every child considers it natural to take care of his mother, wants to do everything so that she feels better and becomes normal at least for a while. Day in and day out, a son or daughter may try to help their mother, but the result is most often codependency—a lifestyle that leaves no time or desire for anything else. In such comfortable conditions, a woman will never be able and will not want to force herself to stop drinking.
What can really help
Although teenagers are quite capable of taking full responsibility for their mother who drinks (and often they have to), the real help from them can only be to alleviate the hangover for the drinker and themselves. Here are some simple guidelines:
- as a result of the abuse of alcoholic beverages, the body loses water in large quantities, which needs to be replenished, so you need to give an alcoholic a hangover to drink a lot (water, berry or fruit juices, herbal teas, cucumber or cabbage brine);
- in order to restore health as soon as possible after a binge, it is worth sending the drinking mother to a shower or bath for at least half an hour (a contrast shower is desirable - several changes of cold and hot water);
- to remove alcohol breakdown products from a hangover organism, you can give a drunkard to drink activated charcoal (1 tablet for every 10 kg of weight);
- it is imperative that an alcoholic mother not only drank plentifully, but also ate well, preferably fatty foods;
- in order to finally bring the mother out of binge, she needs to provide peace for a long sound sleep.
But this is not necessary
It is important for a child whose mother drinks to know not only what needs to be done to support her, but also what is not recommended to do in order to avoid problems.
- With a mother in a state of alcoholic intoxication or in a severe hangover, you should not start a conversation that she needs to stop drinking. Every child wants the mother to return to normal life, but alcoholics under the influence of alcohol are deaf to requests, exhortations, persuasion and pressure on pity. And demanding that she not drink, and trying to get her to promise it, will force the woman to become completely aggressive.
- Even if an alcoholic mother made a promise to change her lifestyle, you should not believe it. A drunkard who wants to drink will promise anything to get the next dose, but the very next day she will do the same thing as always. Therefore, it is impossible to give alcohol to the mother for a “hangover” in any case - this is a vicious circle from which there is no way out.
- Alcoholics emerging from the state of abstinence must be distracted from the thought of alcohol, but this should not be physical activity, since the body weakened by libations can fail at one moment. In addition, it is dangerous for the drinking woman herself, and for her child.
The main advice for children unable to stop drinking alcoholics: be patient. A mother who is addicted to alcohol causes emotional and physical harm, but it must be remembered that she is sick and needs help. You should not be angry or offended, you should not dissolve in problems, dutifully accepting the state of affairs. If the child is not sure that he can cope with his mother on his own, it is better to call relatives for help, and in case of a severe hangover, call a doctor.
adult help
Maximum help to their drinking mothers can be provided by adult children who have both emotional stability and social capabilities to make an alcoholic stop drinking. If grown-up sons and daughters live separately, they are able to move away from resentment accumulated in childhood and disappointment in their mother, supporting her on a different, adult level. At the same time, they should not forget about the simplest manifestations of care, including help with a hangover.
The most important thing an adult child can do for his drinking mother is to persuade her to change her lifestyle and start treatment for alcohol dependence. This must be done carefully and patiently, every day, if the mother is in a more or less sane state, talking to her, but at the same time quite harshly. Important:
- give reasonable arguments confirming the virtues of a sober lifestyle;
- not be categorical and emotional, maintaining emotional balance;
- to restrain himself, not breaking into shouting, rudeness, accusations and abuse;
- not to succumb to pity for an alcoholic, not to lisp with her and not to believe her promises to stop drinking;
- do not take the complaints of a drunkard personally - such people almost always blame their relatives for their illness.
If the mother agrees with the arguments of the children, half the work is done - all that remains is to deliver her to specialists in a drug treatment dispensary or clinic, and after treatment, check whether a breakdown will follow. Another thing is if the drinking woman does not heed her convictions and does not plan to stop drinking. In this case, you have to either give up and leave her with her own problems, or resort to a common trick - pouring and pouring into food and drink special medications. Such drugs form an aversion to alcoholic beverages and eliminate cravings for alcohol.
Obviously
Only adolescents or adult children can provide real help to an alcoholic mother. However, their efforts at best can be directed to facilitating her struggle with a hangover, removing all alcoholic beverages from the house and endless persuasion to pull herself together and start treatment. This does not always work and with varying degrees of effectiveness, which is why children of alcoholics form an ambiguous idea of drunkenness. It is probably for this reason that all such children, with a very small percentage of exceptions, either remain sober for the rest of their lives or follow in the footsteps of their drinking mothers. A woman can fully recover from alcoholism only when she wants it herself.
Alcohol destroys health, intellectual abilities, destroys families, changes the very soul of a person who drinks. Changes become noticeable if you drink alcohol often enough, and the formed alcohol addiction leads to the fact that a person drinks every day, and without strong drinks falls into a depressive state. When a father drinks in a family, the wife becomes the main protector for the children, and she determines what to do to protect the child's psyche from the influence of an alcoholic.
The situation becomes especially threatening when the mother herself drinks, and the children have a particularly difficult time. The child finds himself in a difficult situation where little depends on him. The task of children is to preserve their psyche until the moment when they enter into an independent life. Alcoholics often try to create a feeling of guilt among those around them, and the main thing is to understand that no one dragged mom into drinking, it's just the easiest solution to problems.
Some character traits or genetic predisposition can accelerate the process of alcoholization, but only the person himself can resist the temptation. A teenager, and especially a small child, can hardly find an answer to the question of what to do in a situation that adults give in to. Only the mother herself can save herself from alcohol addiction, if she finds in herself the desire for this.
For children, the fact that their mother drinks, and the fact that they cannot do anything to influence a close, most defining person, is sad, but there is nothing to do, you have to save yourself until the child becomes independent from the whim and mood of an alcoholic in the family. A teenager can be advised to develop immunity to drunkenness, to understand that alcoholic drinks and their promises of happiness are false at their very core. They destroy health, life passes by.
You can feel the tension and joy in life only with a sober mind, and alcoholism indicates that many people cannot meet strong feelings so as not to break. When this person is a mother, there is nothing to console a teenager with, because there is no definite answer on what to do to correct an intolerable situation, how to live with a feeling of painful loneliness. One can only advise to hold out until the onset of maturity, and remember that life can be happy even when childhood is overshadowed by the drunkenness of parents.
Small children
If a mother drinks every day, young children become especially vulnerable. They directly show their emotions, cry when they see that their mother is behaving somehow wrong, because they are afraid for her. Becoming a toy in the inconsistent and unjustified change of mood of an alcoholic, the mother either cuffs her back on the head, or changes her anger to hugs and violent repentance, the child does not know what to do and how to respond to the inadequate behavior of an adult who determines everything in his life. The child asks his mother not to drink and becomes discouraged.
Closer to school age, the child becomes isolated and gets used to being unable to change the situation for the better. In this case, help can come either from grandparents or from the state. And it is no longer about doing something to rid the mother of alcohol addiction, but about protecting the child.
It's different with teenagers. Here there is a high probability that children aged 10-17 will take an asocial path. Blaming their parents for all their misfortunes, they distance themselves from alcoholics and try to establish themselves in the street company. But a person’s life is not scripted, and it may well happen that a son or daughter wants to help their mother quit an addiction. And again, with all the acuteness for them, the question arises of what to do if mom drinks every day.
Activities available to teenagers
Understanding the problem of alcoholism and the fact that addiction can be resisted if you know what to do is available to an adult child, and children in a family of alcoholics grow up early. They not only understand, but are also able to understand the perverted logic of a person guided by alcohol. And this is important in this situation.
Alcoholics, as a rule, skillfully manipulate others, causing feelings of guilt. When a mother drinks every day, then having lost her daily dose of alcohol, she falls into withdrawal symptoms and asks her daughter or son to give her a drink. Since it is clear that the alcoholic is not feeling well, she says that she will die if they do not bring her a drink, and the responsibility will lie with the child. There may be insults or even curses. The child must understand that he should not react to his mother in this state. It is necessary to completely ignore the promises that this is the last time, remembering how many times this was repeated.
Mom needs help, but not to fall into codependency. When the first attempts to fight fail, you cannot blame yourself for this and put your life to save another, even the closest person. It should be clearly understood that a person is responsible for his own destiny, and others can only help when there is a desire to stop drinking. It is also necessary to avoid feelings of resentment and shame for the mother. These feelings are justified, but experiencing them, it is difficult to do something to change the situation for the better. A teenager takes care of his mother when he is left alone with her. If there are other relatives in the house, it is worth entrusting this responsibility to them.
Hangover
Rules of conduct in relation to the mother in a hangover state:
- A person after drinking experiences severe dryness, since the body is dehydrated and in this state it is necessary to give the sufferer water, herbal teas and juices.
- A shower or bath can help. When there are health problems, then room temperature. The procedure should take at least half an hour.
- You can give activated charcoal tablets in the proportion of 1 tablet per 10 kg of body weight.
- It is necessary to eat if, at the sight of food, it does not begin to turn inside out. Suitable salads, vegetable soup or borscht.
- Then you need to ensure peace, a person needs to sleep.
It is important to remember that a serious conversation with the mother should not be started in a state of intoxication or a hangover. No matter how justified reproaches and accusations are, one should not appeal to feelings of guilt and conscience. An alcoholic inadequately evaluates himself and perceives such fame as attacks, begins to defend himself, the situation escalates. Also, requests to stop drinking or promises to stop drinking will not lead to anything.
When a person drinks every day, then the correct withdrawal from binge will contribute to the state of sobriety, then it will be possible to talk heart to heart and explain how bad it is for the child that mom drinks, how she harms her health.
In a hangover state, you should not give the patient alcohol and any medications, but it would be useful to give vitamin C to drink. And if it gets really bad, then you should call an ambulance. Anxiety may be in vain, but you should play it safe, as it is difficult for a teenager to assess the condition on his own.
Find the right moment to talk
It is possible to make attempts to influence a drinking mother with a word when the right moment has come. It is difficult to say when it comes, it is easier to determine when it is not worth doing. But when the moment is chosen, it is necessary to understand that the mother should feel love and care for her life, and not pity or anger. You need to let the person speak out, even when she unfairly blames other people or difficult circumstances for her addiction. Analysis of the situation can be postponed until later.
You need to reach out to consciousness and convince your mother to be treated for alcoholism. She will be able to realize responsibility for her behavior in a state of intoxication under the influence of the methods of a narcologist or psychotherapist. The task of a son or daughter, if they live together with their mother, is to explain that past circumstances should be left behind, and they should not be disturbed by memories. It is important what is happening at the moment between her and the child. And either she turns to the doctors for help, or she dies.
When consent is received, then you need to strike while the iron is hot, and immediately, on the same day, sign up for a consultation with a narcologist, and not leave the matter for tomorrow. Pack your bag and go straight to the hospital. A child should do something with an alcoholic only if there is no one else to help, and the teenager lives with his mother, who for some reason has not been deprived of maternal rights. If you have interested relatives or friends, you should not hide, but rather ask them for advice and entrust them with responsibility for the alcoholic.
