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Body language predates cosmetics, clothing, and even speech. Therefore, it is he who primarily affects how people perceive us.

We are in site We believe that there should be more charming people, so here's a short guide to gestures that you shouldn't use unnecessarily, so as not to ruin your attractiveness.

1. Hand behind the back in a grip

Holding your hand behind your forearm is a strong negative signal to those around you. Because we usually take this position when we are gloomy or angry. And the higher you grab your hand, the more unhappy you seem to people.

2. Crossed ankles

Crossed ankles show that we are not sure what we are talking about. If you also have your hands in your pockets, you can bet that no one will even listen to what you talk about there.

By hiding their hands in their pockets, usually a person is trying to hide their nervousness. Although this gesture has many meanings and must be interpreted together, we most often use it when we are nervous.

3. Hands in the lock

The arms locked into a lock are like a mini version of the arms crossed over the chest. “I want to isolate myself, I’m not with you, I’m in the house,” - this is what this gesture is broadcasting to those around.

4. Raised hands in the castle

A variation of the previous pose, only here it is even worse. The higher you lift the lock out of your hands, the more you want to hide behind it.

5. Slouching

Poor posture not only harms the body, but also signals to others that you are helpless, unsure of yourself, and in general you are not doing well. The same applies to the shuffling gait associated with older people.

Straighten your back and raise your legs when you walk - it will change your appearance more than a new dress, believe me.

6. Crooked smile

For many, such a crooked smile has already become a habit, and in vain: people perceive it more as a grimace of sarcasm. Do not follow the example of the bad guys from the movies, do not hesitate to smile sincerely and openly - this way you will gain a lot more fans.

7. Palm extended towards the interlocutor

This gesture is not read by everyone, but you should still be careful with it. If you are sitting with a person at a table and chatting, do not put your hand in front of him, as in the photo. The interlocutor may regard this sign as "Please stop chatting" and will remember you as an unpleasant interlocutor.

All this, of course, does not apply to the situation when the person you want to take by the hand is sitting in front of you.

8. Fists, rested on the sides

Quite an aggressive posture, which we sometimes adopt simply because we do not know where to put our hands. Her signal is: “So what are you going to tell me? In any case, I will not agree. " To put it mildly, not very conducive to conversation and trust.

9. Thumb swing

We all know this gesture: a person seems to point his thumb somewhere back. It turns out that it can often be viewed as neglect. You seem to say: “Yes, I know, I know,” and any of your answers looks like a careless go-ahead.

10. Hands folded into a fist

This position of the hands speaks of hidden tension and fear, and the higher the fist is raised, the higher the degree of tension. You seem to be ready to take a hit from someone. People around you feel this, therefore, with people who sit in business negotiations with clenched fists, less often deals are made.

What is finger gymnastics for?

Let's summarize how much useful things we do by playing finger games.

1. We develop speech... Exercising and rhythmically moving his fingers, the baby activates the speech centers of the brain.

2. Finger gymnastics develops the baby's ability to imitate us adults ... teaches to listen to our speech and understand it… increases speech activity crumbs ... and just creates a favorable emotional atmosphere.

3. Teaches the child concentrate attention and distribute it correctly... This is a very, very important skill! By the way, a child will be able to learn to arbitrarily control his attention only by the age of 6-7 years. And his school success will largely depend on this skill.

4. When the baby starts to speak and is able to accompany the exercise from finger gymnastics with verses, this will do it speech is clearer, more rhythmic, brighter... In addition, in this way he can increase control over your movements.

5. In finger games, you need to memorize a lot: the position of the fingers, and the sequence of movements, and just poetry. Here's a great fun exercise. for the development of baby's memory!

6. Is it possible with the help of finger games develop fantasy and imagination? Of course! After all, you can “tell” whole stories with your hands! First, mom or dad will show an example, and only then the child can compose his own "finger stories".

7. Well, in the end, after all these exercises hands and fingers will become strong, mobile, flexible... And this will help in the future in mastering writing skills!

Mouse

The mouse made its way into the hole,
(We make creeping movements with two handles)
Locked on the lock.
(Slightly wiggle fingers crossed into the castle)
She looks into the hole,
(Making a ring with your fingers)
The cat is sitting on the fence!
(We apply the handles to the head like ears and wiggle our fingers)

Two girlfriends.

Two girlfriends on the lawn (Pat the knees to the rhythm of the text)

Kva-kva-kva, kva-kva-kva. (Clap your hands to the rhythm of the text)

Two green frogs: (Clapping knees)

Kva-kva-kva, kva-kva-kva. (Claps of your hands).

Kwa! (Trample with one foot).

Singing in chorus: (Put your palms together and slightly open your mouth to the frogs).

Kwa-kwa-kwa, (claps)

Kva-kva-kva. (Pritopes with a foot to the rhythm of the text).

And they interfere with sleep (shake your finger).

Kva-kva-kva, kva-kva-kva! (Clap your hands). Kwa!

The finger is thick and BIG

I went into the garden for plums.

POINTING from the doorstep

Showed him the way.

The MIDDLE finger is the most accurate.

He knocks the plums off the branch.

THE NAMELESS eats.

A little finger-gentleman

Planting bones in the ground.

At the edge of the house stands. (Fold your palms with a house above your head).

There is a lock on the doors. (Close your palms into a "lock").

There is a table behind the doors, (Cover the left fist with the palm of your right hand).

There is a palisade around the house. (Hands in front of you, fingers spread out).

Knock-Knock! Open the door! (Knock one palm against the other with a fist).

Come in, I'm not angry! (Hands to the sides, palms upside down).

Compote.

We put one hand with the palm up, and with the index finger of the other hand we move it along the palm in a circular motion, "stirring the compote":

We cook, we cook compote.

You need a lot of fruit. Here: (We bend our fingers one by one.)

We will crush apples,

Cut and boil pears

Squeeze out the lemon juice

Put the drain and sand. (We unbend all the fingers and again "mix".)

We cook, we cook compote,

Let's treat honest people!

Fingers.

Bend the fingers of your left hand, starting with the little finger, alternately to the palm with the words:

This finger wants to sleep

This finger went to bed

This finger took a nap,

This finger has already fallen asleep,

Hush, hush, do not make noise, (We swing the fist with our right hand.)

The red sun will rise

A clear morning will come

Birds will chirp

Fingers will get up! (Fingers fan out with force.)

House on the mountain.

On the mountain we see a house. (Fold the house down with the hands of your hands).

Lots of greenery around. (Wave-like movements of the hands).

Here are the trees, here are the bushes (Use your hands to make “trees” and “bushes”).

Here are fluffy flowers! (Use your fingers to show a bud - a blossoming flower).

The fence surrounds everything. (Show a "fence" of fingers in front of you).

Behind the fence is a clean courtyard. (Stroke the table with your palms).

We open the gate (show the gate with the hands, the gate opens).

We quickly run up to the house. (Fingers "run" on the table).

We knock on the door: “Knock - knock - knock! "(Knock your fists on the table).

Someone is coming to knock on us. (Put your palm to your right ear, listen).

We came to visit a friend

And they brought gifts. (Stretch your arms forward, as if presenting something)

"Orange"

We were sharing an orange! (Fist - "orange" in front of him.)

There are many of us, (The left hand is spread out - this is "we".)

And he is alone. (We look at the cam.)

This slice is for kittens, (We bend one finger.)

This slice is for ducklings, (We bend another finger.)

This slice is for a snake, (We bend the third finger.)

This slice is for a siskin, (We bend the fourth finger.)

This slice is for a beaver, (We bend the fifth finger.)

And for the wolf, the peel! (Shake the brush with relaxed fingers, like a peel.)

The wolf is angry - trouble,

Run who where! (We hide our hands behind our backs.)

"Ship"

A boat is sailing along the river, (Connect palms with a boat.)

He floats from afar. (Wavy hand movements.)

There are four on the boat (Show 4 fingers simultaneously on each hand.)

A very brave sailor.

They have ears on the top of their heads. (Fold both palms to the top of the head.)

They have long tails. (Fold your fingers together and spread them apart.)

And only cats are afraid of them,

Only cats and cats. (With spread fingers of both hands, make scratching movements.)

"Clouds"

Clouds like sails (Draw a triangle with your index fingers.)

The wind rushes them, drives them, (Sharply put forward one hand, then the other.)

If there are a lot of clouds - (Put your hand in front of you, all fingers are spread apart.)

It will definitely rain. (Tapping the index finger of one hand on the palm of the other.)

Well, if the clouds,

Like a feather of a firebird, (Raise your right hand up, spread your fingers.)

There will be a sun in the morning, (Both hands up, spread your fingers, spread your arms to the sides.)

The birds will chirp. (Draw wings with your hands.)

And they will collide forehead on forehead - (Fist to hit on fist.)

They will turn into a cloud, (Draw a large circle in the air.)

And then thunder rumbles - (Claps hands.)

The clouds are angry. (Clench your fists, put your hands in front of you.)

Bunny.

Bunny galloped through the forest, (fingers "jump" on the table)
Bunny was looking for food. (with the fingers of both hands, alternately sort through the table)
Suddenly the bunny on top
The ears went up like arrows. (we depict ears with handles)
A quiet rustle is heard:
Someone is sneaking through the forest. (fingers walk slowly across the table)
The hare confuses the tracks
Running away from trouble . (fingers run quickly in a circle on the table)

Fingers.

Here are my assistants,

Turn them as you like.

One, two, three, four, five,

It does not sit with them again.

Knocked, turned,

And they didn't want to work.

This finger wants to sleep

This finger - jumped into bed,

This finger nipped,

This finger has already fallen asleep.

And the other has been sleeping a long time ago. (We bend our fingers, starting with the thumb).

Who is making noise with us?

Hush, hush, do not make noise,

Don't wake up your fingers! (In a whisper).

A clear morning will come

The clear sun will rise (Louder)

The birds will sing

Fingers will get up. (Loud) .

Wake up kids!

It's time to go to kindergarten! (All raise their hands with open palms).

My fingers.

Days of the week.

On Monday I washed (three fists against each other)
She swept the floor on Tuesday. (hands of relaxed hands down and make imitating movements on the table)
On Wednesday I baked a roll, (we bake "pies")
I was looking for the ball all Thursday (we bring our right hand to the forehead and make a "visor")
I washed the cups on Friday, (the fingers of the left hand are bent, the palm is on the edge, and with the index finger of the right hand we move in a circle inside the left hand)
And on Saturday I bought a cake . (palms open and joined together along the side of the little fingers)
All girlfriends on Sunday
Called for my birthday . (we wave our palms to ourselves)

Malanya

At Malanya, at the old woman

(Clap hands: right or left hand on top.)

We lived in a small hut

(Fold your arms in a corner, showing the "hut".)

Seven sons

(Show seven fingers.)

All without eyebrows

(Contour eyebrows with your fingers.)

With these ears,

(Bring your palms with outstretched fingers to your ears.)

With these noses,

(Show a long nose by placing palms with outstretched fingers one after the other.)

With a head like this

(Draw a large circle around the head.)

With such a beard!

(Show a large beard with your hands.)

They didn't drink or eat,

(Bring the "cup" to your mouth with one hand, the "spoon" with the other.)

Everyone looked at Malinya

(Keeping your hands close to your eyes, pat your fingers like eyelashes.)

And everyone did it like this ...

(Children show hidden actions only with their fingers.)

"Cooked lunch"

Somehow we sat down to dinner

(Simulates the movement of a spoon.)

And they called the neighbors to the house.

(Call with a movement of the palm towards you.)

They covered the white tablecloth,

(We smooth out the movements of the tablecloth.)

Spoons, forks laid out,

(Step-by-step movements with the right hand palm down from left to right.)

Sliced ​​bread and cheese

(Movements up and down with the edge of the palm.)

Prepared a side dish

(Rubbing firmly with fingertips.)

Stopped it in a cup

(Rotational movements forward, one hand over the other.)

(Make rings from the thumb and forefinger, connect them, and then spread them apart, depicting a round sausage.)

And minced meat cutlets for everyone

We fried without diet.

(The palms are laid alternately one on top of the other.)

Salted and pepper,

(Small movements with a pinch of fingers.)

Kneaded. Have not forgotten

(Squeezing and unclenching the fingers.)

Put an angry onion

(Show “collecting tears” in the palm of your hand.)

And rather close everything.

(Clap into the palm horizontally.)

Ready, tired,

They did not bake the cake.

(Slide the back of your hand over your forehead.)

Winter.

One, two, three, four, five, (bend fingers one by one)
We went for a walk in the yard.
They sculpted the Snow Baba, (we imitate the sculpting of lumps),
The birds were fed with crumbs, ("crumbling bread" with all our fingers)
Then we rode down the hill, (we move the palm of the right hand along the palm of the left hand)
And they were lying in the snow. (we put our palms on the table with one or the other side)
Everyone came home in the snow (we shake off our palms)
We ate the soup and went to bed. (we make movements with an imaginary spoon, put our hands under the cheek)

Finger game "House on the Hill"
On the mountain we see a house. (Put your hands together to fold the "house".)
Lots of greenery around. (Wave-like movements of the hands.)
Here are the trees, here are the bushes. (Make "trees", "bushes" with your hands.)
Here are the fragrant flowers. (Show "bud" with your fingers.)
The fence surrounds everything. (Show the "fence" with your fingers.)
Behind the fence is a clean courtyard. (Stroke the table with your palms.)
We open the gate. (Use the hands to show the "gate".)
We quickly run up to the house. (Use your fingers to "run" across the table.)
We knock on the door: "Knock-knock-knock!" (Knock your fists on the table.)
Someone is coming to knock on us ... (Put the palm to the right ear, “listen”.)
We came to visit a friend. (Stretch your arms forward while presenting something.)
And they brought gifts.

Finger game "House"

I want to build a house Hands above the head "house

So that the window is in it, Hands before eyes. The ends of the fingers are closed in a ring

So that there is a door at the house, The palms are turned towards themselves, closed by the lateral parts.

Nearby so that the pine tree grows The fingers are spread out. We pull our hands up

So that there is a fence around Hands in front of you, fingers connected

The dog was guarding the gate. Palms closed in front of chest, thumbs

raised

The sun was Hands crossed, fingers spread out

The rain was falling Shaking movements

And the tulip blossomed in the garden. The forearms are flattened. Petal fingers are watching

Up

"AUTUMN LEAVES"

"LARISKA HAS TWO REDISKI"

"THE RAIN WALK OUT FOR A WALK"

Yablonka

An apple tree stands by the road,
Braid your arms over your head, fingers unclenched.
The apple hangs on a branch.
Fold your wrists together.
I shook the branch strongly,
Hands above your head, moving back and forth.
Here we have a bull's-eye.
The palms in front of the chest imitate holding an apple.
I'll yell at the sweet apple,
Connect the wrists, open the palms.
Ah, what a delicious taste.

Walk.

Let's go for a walk
Hands are clenched into fists, thumbs "run" on the table.
And catch up with the latter.
Index fingers "run" on the table.
Run a third of your fingers
Middle fingers.
And the fourth on foot.
Unnamed fingers.
The fifth finger jumped
Touch the table rhythmically with both little fingers.
And at the end of the path he fell.
Bang your fists on the table.

"On the tree"

We were having fun at the tree (Rhythmic clapping.)

And they danced and frolicked, (Rhythmic punches with fists.)

After the good Santa Claus (Children "walk" with the middle and the pointer-

He gave us gifts. fingers of both hands on the table.)

Gave huge packages (They "draw" a large circle with their hands.)

They also contain delicious items: (They make rhythmic claps.)

Sweets in blue pieces of paper (Bend fingers on both hands,

Nuts next to them starting with the big one.)

An apple, one golden tangerine.

"Rybka"

The fish swims in water (Palms folded together

The fish is fun to play. depict a fish swimming.)

Fish, fish, mischief, (They threaten with a finger.)

We want to catch you. (Slowly they bring their palms together.)

The fish bent its back (They portray again,

like a fish swims.)

She took a crumb of bread. (Do grasping

movement with both hands.)

The fish waved its tail, (They "float" again.)

The fish quickly swam away.

"Rabbit"

Little rabbit (Press the brushes to the head, like ears.)

With big ears
Pink nose (Touch your nose.)
Funny mustache. (Index fingers are pressed to lips.)
Digs deep mink for itself (Roy knock.)
Strong paws

In the soft ground.
He cleans his fur ("Cleaning the fur".)

Or asleep. (We put our hands under the cheek.)
The rabbit always wiggles its ears. (We move our "ears".)
Hears footsteps and foxes and wolves,
He hides in his burrow from enemies. (Cover your face with your palms.)

"House"

Under the mushroom - a hut-house, (Palms hut)

A cheerful gnome lives there. (Knock one hand fist about

We will knock softly palm of the other hand)

We'll ring the bell. ("We ring the bell")
The gnome will open the door for us,
Will call to the hut-house.

There is a plank floor in the house, (The palms are pressed against each other with an edge.)

And on it is an oak table. (Showing the table)

Nearby is a high-backed chair (Showing a chair)

On the table is a plate with a fork. (The palm of the left hand is directed
And the pancakes are like a mountain - up (cymbal), right hand (fork):
A treat for the guys. palm down

four fingers straightened

and slightly spread apart, and the large one is pressed against the palm)

« Washing"(Finger massage)

We know, we know - yes - yes - yes,

Where are you hiding, water!

(alternately massage each finger)

Come out, voditsa,

We have come to wash!

Lay on your palm

Po - it - knife - ku.

No, not a little -

Dare!

It will be more fun to wash!

(rub the palms and hands vigorously.)

« Caring sun»

The sun sends from the sky

Ray, ray, ray.

(children cross their arms rhythmically over their heads)

And they boldly disperse

Clouds, clouds, clouds.

(gently shake hands above)

Gently warms in summer

Cheeks, cheeks, cheeks.

(rubbing their cheeks rhythmically)

And in the spring he puts on his nose

Points - points - points.

Freckles of children are golden.

They really like it!

(rhythmically tapping a finger on the nose.)

"Winter fun"

We make a lump of snow,
(Children clench and unclench their hands)
We blind the house from the lumps.
(Connect the tips of the fingers, slightly spread the palms to the sides)
The animals will live in the house
(Clap their hands)
Have fun and be friends
Guard the house together
(Connect hands in a "lock")
One, two, three, four, five, (bend their fingers.)
You and I made a snowball. (children "sculpt")
Round, strong, very smooth (Show a circle, squeeze palms, stroke one palm with the other.)
And not at all sweet. (They threaten with a finger.)
Once - we'll throw it up, (Throw it up).
Two - we'll catch (Catch).
Three - drop (Drop).
And ... let's break (stomp).

"Helping Mommy"

“We help mom -
We wipe the dust everywhere. (Movement through the text)
We are washing clothes now
Rinse, squeeze.
We sweep everything around -
And running for milk.
We meet mom in the evening
We open the doors wide
We hug Mom tightly. "

"Hats"

In yellow hats, we became chickens, (the child waves his arms like a chicken's wings.)
In white hats, we became rabbits, (shows bunny ears)
In red caps, we became mushrooms, (connects his hands above his head).
In black hats - blueberries on bumps, (sits down on his haunches.)
Wearing blue hats with raindrops of steel (gets up, puts his hands on his belt.)
And we rode along the paths easily. (jumps forward on two legs.)

"Kindness"

If your fingers are sad - They want kindness.	we press our fingers tightly to the palm
If your fingers cry - Offended them, someone means.	shake with brushes
We'll spare our fingers - We will warm you with our kindness.	"Wash" hands, breathe on them
We will press our palms to ourselves,	alternately, 1 at the top, 1 at the bottom.
We will begin to iron it affectionately.	stroking the palm with the other palm
Let your palms hug Let them play a little.	cross your fingers, press your palms fingers of two hands knock quickly and easily
Each finger needs to be taken And hug you tighter.	we clamp each finger in a fist

Harvest

Vegetables grow in the garden bed.
Count them in order:
Cabbage, pepper, cucumber,	fist, rib, palm
I'm doing well today.	stroking ourselves on the chest
Vegetables grow in the garden	cross fingers on two hands, take turns to raise fingers
What will we see here?	connect fingers on two hands in turn
Potatoes, tomatoes, carrots,	fist, rib, palm
We will praise ourselves again.	stroking ourselves on the chest

"New Year"

New Year is coming!	clap our hands
Children lead a round dance.	the hands are interlocked with the fingers, the arms are extended, the hands are inward and outward
Balls hang on the tree	alternately connect the fingers on two hands, forming a ball
Flashlights are on.	flashlights
Here the ice floes sparkle	clench and unclench fists in turn
Snowflakes are spinning.	easy and smooth movement of brushes
Santa Claus is coming to visit,	fingers walking on the knees or on the floor
He brings gifts to everyone.	three palms together
	slap on the knees or on the floor, one hand with a palm, the other with a fist, and then change
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10.	massage each finger in turn

Finger gymnastics "Travel"

Knock-Knock, Knock-Knock. Our ears hear a knock.	near the ear, each finger knocks on the thumb 3 times
Here are the palms rustling,	rubbing palms together
Our fingers are cracking.	rubbing fists together
Now hit your hands loudly,
Now you warm them up.	palms on cheeks
Are you ready for the trip?	fists on my knees
	hands up, palms open
We will hit the road again:	rotational movements with brushes
We'll take a plane And let's take flight.	arms outstretched to the sides, palms tense
We're on a ship now We are rocked by the wave.	palms in a boat, one up, the second down
The train is coming	with the edge of the palm we move along the knees or on the table
The wheels are beating.	cams banging on the knees or on the table
There are a lot of funny guys (animals) on the train.	with your fingertips, alternately press on your knees or on the table

List the names of children (animals). Children repeat and slap their hands on their knees or on the table.

Winter

Winter has come,	three palms together
Brought frost.	massage the shoulders, forearms with your fingers
Winter has come,	three palms together
Nose freezes.	massage the tip of the nose with the palm of your hand
	smooth movements of the palms
	fists knock on knees alternately
	palms shuffle knees in different directions
Everyone on the street - forward!	one hand on the knees with the palm of the hand, the other hand is bent at the elbow, fist (change)
We'll put on warm pants	we run our palms along the legs
Hat, fur coat, felt boots.	we run our palms over the head, hands, stamp our feet
Warm hands in mittens	circular movements with the palms of one hand around the other palm
And we'll tie the scarves.	we put our palms on top of each other to the base of the neck
Call the winter month!	palms hitting knees
It's December, January, February.	fist, rib, palm

Pay attention to the interlocutor during the conversation. How often does he gesture to accompany his speech? How emotionally does he do it? What actions do your fingers slip?

Many people use their hands during a conversation to make their speech more emotional. Sometimes, with the help of finger gestures, you can understand what mood a person is in or what he really wants to convey to the interlocutor.

Raised palm up

In most countries, a raised palm indicates a stop signal. This application is used in the course of a conversation to stop the interlocutor.

The second designation is "greeting" or "goodbye", when the palm is raised up for a short time. But among the peoples of Greece, this is an insulting gesture, after which a conflict will immediately follow.

Connecting the fingertips of both hands

When the interlocutor puts his fingertips together, you can immediately understand that he is filled with calmness and confidence in himself and his knowledge. Such people are stingy with emotions and are very balanced.

Also, the gesture denotes a moment of reflection and decision-making. In this interpretation, it was used several hundred years ago in judicial sessions.

Crossed index and middle fingers

In many Western countries for good luck. In Russia, two designations correspond to this gesture: for good luck and as the cancellation of one's words. When a person makes any promise that he is not going to hold back or his speech is unreliable, then he keeps crossed fingers behind his back in order to "take away all responsibility" for what was said.

But in the Vatican, showing this gesture to the interlocutor, a person insults him, since in this country such a plexus of fingers means female genital organs.

Forefinger calling gesture

On the territory of Russia, as well as in many European and Western countries, an extended and curving forefinger is called to someone, but it is considered a "slang" symbol and is not used in cultural communication. In Asian countries, this gesture is prohibited. In the Philippines, dogs are called in this way, so its use in relation to a person is humiliating and insulting.

Kukish

Such a sign is interpreted differently in different countries. So, among the inhabitants of Russia this is an expression of refusal, and in a rude form. And for the Brazilians, on the contrary, it is a symbol of goodwill, to whom they wish good health and good luck. Therefore, in this country it is used quite often.

Middle finger

This gesture in most civilized countries is obscene, offensive. It symbolizes the male genitals, and in this designation the middle finger was used in the days of the ancient Romans.

Fist

When all fingers on one or both hands are pressed to the palm, that is, clenched in, it indicates a person's hostile attitude.

The emergence of finger gestures

The use of fingers during colloquial speech or separately from it began its existence many centuries ago, even during the formation of civilization. Gestures have been used especially often in religions.

For Christians, finger movements, folding them into various plexuses were used during the reading of prayers, worship.

For Muslims, each phalanx of the fingers, as well as the palm, are endowed with a letter of the alphabet.

In France, when various secret societies were organized, members of these societies communicated with finger and hand gestures. Moreover, the gestures were known only to them and were secret.

In Chinese medicine, the fingers were used to treat the entire body by clicking on specific points. Therefore, in Asian countries, hands are also a symbol of health, and gesticulations with their help are prohibited.

Over time, the use of fingers as a way of communication took root in public life and began to be supplemented with new symbols, changing its meaning. Now most people use this method of communication, sometimes unconsciously, expressing their emotional outburst.

For people with disabilities, this is the only way to interact with the outside world. Hence, finger gestures cannot be ignored when communicating.

DO NOT SHOULD POINT WITH FINGER

Focus group research suggests that prosecutors in court should exercise caution when pointing their index finger at the defendant during their opening remarks. The jury does not like this behavior, because the prosecutor is not entitled to such pointing gestures until the accused is proven guilty. It would be much better if he began to point at the defendant with his whole five hands (palm up) than with his finger. Only after the guilt of the defendant is proven, the accuser can angrily point his pointing finger at him during the concluding speech. To some, this may seem like a trifle, but dozens of interviews with potential jurors unambiguously testify to their scrupulousness in this matter. So in my class I just tell the lawyers that they shouldn't point their fingers at anyone in the courtroom. As for other situations in life, it is better for all of us to avoid this gesture when communicating with our legitimate halves or children, as well as with colleagues at work. Pointing with a finger is always an expression of aggression.

using the hands or fingers. Some of them, such as the extended middle finger (in America this gesture is called "release the bird"), are so well known since the times of ancient Rome that they do not need comment. It is indecent to snap your fingers trying to get someone's attention; you should never use a gesture to beckon the dog. When, during the 2005 trial of Michael Jackson, the mother of one of the victims began snapping her fingers in the direction of the jury as if they were waiters in a restaurant, they did not like this very much and, ultimately, influenced the verdict. For those of you interested in the use and meaning of gestures around the world, there is a wealth of literature on the eloquence of the hands in expressing human emotions.

While smartening up, do not forget about decency

When a person is preoccupied with their appearance, they use their fingers to tidy up their clothes, hair, and body. During courtship, people do beautification much more often than usual - and the object of their attention is not only their own appearance, but also the appearance of their partner. The intimate nature of the relationship gives the woman the right to carefully brush away a speck of dust from the sleeve of her lover, and he gently remove the crumbs of food stuck to the corner of her mouth. Mothers behave in a similar way towards children, and not only in humans, but also in other species of mammals and birds (scientists call this gru-ming). Usually, this behavior is indicative of caring and close intimacy. As for romantic relationships, observing such actions allows you to judge the degree of mutual understanding and closeness of partners.

At times, however, preening can have a negative effect. For example, if a person begins to selflessly engage in his appearance at the moment when he is told something, then such behavior is considered impolite and disrespectful (see Fig. 47). In addition, some methods of dressing up in public are more socially acceptable than others. No one will judge you if, while on the bus, you take off your sweater in ° Rsinku, but if you start in a public place,

cut fingernails in front of strangers, then they will look at you at all otherwise. In addition, pretense practices that are permissible in one situation or country may not be appropriate in another. Finally, you should never tidy up the appearance of another person with your own hands if your relationship has not reached the degree of intimacy that gives you the right to behave this way.

The appearance of the hands

Observing the hands sometimes allows determine the profession or hobby of the person. Those who are engaged in hard physical labor are betrayed by calluses and rough skin of the hands. An agricultural worker or sportsman can be identified by

characteristic scars from a farm or competition. The habit of standing holding hands with bent fingers on the side and in the middle of the thighs indicates that a person is well acquainted with the command "to attention". Corns on fingertips one hand is a characteristic sign of a guitarist.

In addition, the hands can be used to judge whether we take good care of ourselves and how we relate to social conventions. Hands and nails may be well-groomed or neglected. For some reason, it is believed that long nails in men are a sign of effeminacy, and the habit of biting fingernails is usually perceived as evidence of nervousness or insecurity (see Fig. 48). Since the hands are so important to the human brain, good hand hygiene should be a special concern for anyone seeking to make a good impression on others.

Sweaty palms

No one likes to shake hands with a person who has wet palms, and therefore I advise everyone who, when meeting people (especially such important people as a potential employer, relatives of a future spouse, or influential patrons), sweat their hands, wipe their palms before stretching them to shake. Our palms not only sweat when we are very hot, but also when we are nervous or stressed. If, when coming into contact with a person, you find that his palms are sweaty, then this may mean that he is under stress (the excitation of the limbic system causes increased sweating). Consider this an opportunity to earn some positives in interpersonal relationships and do your best to quietly help the person calm down. Encouraging and comforting people under stress is better than many other ways to create the preconditions for open, effective, and successful interactions.

Some people believe that if a person's palms are sweating, then they are lying. This is a typical misconception. The sweat glands are controlled by the same part of our nervous system that is activated during the "freeze, run or fight" limbic response (sympathetic nervous system). If sweating of the palms can be caused by such a simple reason as meeting a new person, then this phenomenon cannot be interpreted as an indicator of deception. According to Peter Colette, author of The Language of Thought. How to learn to read a person's thoughts by his movements and actions ”, approximately five percent of the population suffers from excessive sweating, and such chronic sweating causes unpleasant moisture in the palms (in medicine, such excessive sweating is called hyperhidrosis). Sweaty palms are not a sign of deception. This is just a sign of stress or, in some cases, a genetic disorder. Therefore, I advise you to be very careful when assessing the causes of wet palms. All the statements of the so-called "experts" that when a person lies, his palms sweat - this is just fiction.

READING NON-VERBAL HAND SIGNALS

So far, we have talked about how the behavior of the hands and their appearance give a certain impression to other people. Now let's look at some of the non-verbal hand signals that help us understand what other people are thinking and feeling. I'll start with a few general notes about how the hands reveal information, and then move on to some of the typical signals of confidence or uncertainty that our hands can use to help us read people as we interact with them.

Nervous Hand Behavior Conveys Important Information

The ends of our hands and fingers are specially designed for fine, precise movements. When the limbic brain is overexcited 11 stressed or nervous, the powerful release of neurotransmitters and hormones such as epinephrine (epinephrine) causes uncontrolled tremors in the hands and fingers. In addition, our hands can shake when we hear, see, or think about things that could have negative consequences. Any objects in our hands at this moment can intensify this tremor, which contains a telegraphic message from the brain: "I am under stress." This tremor becomes especially noticeable when a person is holding some thin and long object, such as a pencil or cigarette, or something relatively large but light, such as a sheet of paper. The subject begins to tremble immediately upon a statement or event that creates a stressful environment.

Positive emotions can also cause shaking in the hands holding a lucky lottery ticket or winning poker hand. Any strong excitement or excitement causes trembling in the hands, which is far from always possible to calm down with an effort of will, since this is not a limbic reaction controlled by consciousness. When parents, spouses, and other family members anxiously await a soldier or relative returning home, their hands often tremble with excitement. They may hold each other's hands, pinch their hands under the armpits, or clap their hands at chest level to stop trembling. In old videos about the Beatles' first visit to America, there are a lot of shots of young girls clapping their hands to calm the tremors caused by extreme excitement.

When you notice that someone's hands are shaking, then first of all determine whether it is caused by fear or joy. To do this, you need to evaluate this element of behavior in context - to analyze the circumstances in which it arose. If hand tremors are accompanied by calming actions such as touching the neck or closing the lips, then personally I tend to attribute this to stress (something negative) rather than some positive reason.

It should be noted that hand shake can only be considered a signal of non-verbal communication if it is the result of a change in the normal behavior of the hands. If human hands tremble constantly (in medicine it is called tremor), because, for example, he abuses coffee or is addicted to drugs, alcohol, then such a tremor, although it reveals certain information about a person, is still part of the basic model of non-verbal behavior of this person. Similarly, in people with certain neurological disorders, such as Parkinson's disease, hand tremors may have nothing to do with their emotional state. Therefore, if the hands of such a person suddenly stop trembling for some time, then this may be the result of a conscious attempt to focus on a specific object that was just discussed. As you remember, the most important thing for us is the change in behavior.

As a general recommendation, I will say that any hand tremor that suddenly starts, then stops, or in some other noticeable way compares from the basic behavior model, deserves careful analysis. Interpreting these behaviors in a meaningful way, taking into account the context in which they occur and the moment when they appear, as well as any other actions or gestures that support your conclusions, will greatly increase your ability to read people correctly.

SMOKE (NERVOUS TRAVEL) WITHOUT FIRE

When I was able to investigate a high-profile espionage case, I interrogated a man who might have the information we were interested in. During interrogation, he lit a cigarette. I had no real clues to consider him involved in the case: no witnesses to the crime, no promising versions, but only vague assumptions about who could be involved. During interrogation, I named many people of interest to the FBI and Army Intelligence in connection with this case, and I noticed that every time I mentioned the name of a certain Konrad, cigarette in the man's hand twitched like a polygraph recorder (lie detector). To understand if it was a simple accident or something more significant, I began to check his reaction by naming some other names. There was no reaction. And yet in four different situations, whenever I mentioned Konrad's name, the informant's cigarette flinched every time. This was enough for me to be convinced of the existence of a connection between the interrogated and the unknown to us Konrad. The shaking of the cigarette was a limbic response to threat. In addition, I realized that the mention of this name caused a person to feel a sense of danger, and, therefore, he either knew something about the crime, or was directly involved in it.

During this first interrogation, I did not know whether or not the informant was actually involved in the crime, because, frankly, I had not yet had time to go into all the details. The only thing that prompted us to continue our investigation in this direction and to conduct additional interrogations was his “hand shake” reaction in response to the mention of one name. Perhaps, if not for this small detail of behavior, he would have managed to elude justice. In the end, after many interrogations over the course of a year, he confessed to assisting Konrad in his espionage activities, and confessed to all of his crimes.

HAND SIGNALS FOR CONFIDENCE

WITH Confidence signals express an extremely comfortable state of the brain. Certain hand signs of confidence show us that the person is quite happy and satisfied with the current state of affairs.

Hands "house"

The joining of the hands in a “house” is perhaps the most expressive emblem of complete confidence in one’s rightness and strength of the position (see Fig. 49). The gesture consists in connecting the tips of the straightened fingers of both hands and is similar to the position of the hands during prayer, differing only in that the bases fingers are spread apart and the palms do not touch. It is called a "house" because the hands form a kind of peaked roof of a church building. In the United States, women hold their hands low when performing this gesture (usually at waist level), which is sometimes difficult to spot. Men tend to fold their arms in a "house" at chest level, which makes the gesture more noticeable and expressive.

Hands folded like a house means that you are confident in your opinion or position. This gesture

makes people clear about your attitude to the issue under discussion and warns that you are ready to persist in defending your point of view. High-status people (lawyers, judges, doctors) often incorporate house-jointed fingers into their daily expressive repertoire to emphasize self-confidence and superiority. From time to time, this gesture is used by each of us, but the whole difference is how often and in what form. Some people do it all the time, others rarely, and still others modify the gesture (for example, they connect only straightened index fingers and thumbs, and the rest are intertwined). Someone folds their hands in a "house" under the table, someone high in front of them, and some even over their heads.

Those who do not know anything about the non-verbal meaning of this expressive gesture can hold their hands.

"House" for a long time, especially in favorable situations for oneself. And even when people know perfectly well that this gesture betrays their condition, it is still difficult for them to hide it. The limbic brain brings this reaction to such a degree of automatism that it is extremely difficult to suppress it, especially in a state of arousal, when a person forgets about the need to monitor and control their actions.

O Circumstances can quickly change and make adjustments to our attitude towards events and people. In such cases, a fraction of a second is enough for us to turn a gesture of complete confidence into a demonstration of uncertainty. If our confidence is shaken or a seed of doubt appears in the brain, then our fingers, connected by the "house", can instantly intertwine and bring our hands into a prayer position (see Fig. 50). These changes in non-verbal behavior occur very quickly and accurately reflect our instantaneous spontaneous responses to changing events. A person can repeatedly change the position of his fingers, then connecting them with a "house" (a sign of confidence), then intertwining them (a sign of uncertainty). These changes accurately reflect the ongoing struggle between confidence and doubt, with varying degrees of success.

FOLDED HOME HANDS CONVINCE THE JURIOR

V the strength of non-verbal behavior can be verified by studying the effect of the gesture of joining hands with a “house” in different social conditions. This gesture is useful for witnesses in the courtroom, it is even specifically recommended for those who act as expert witnesses. Hands folded like a house emphasize important points and confirm the expert's confidence in what he is saying. When examiners behave in this way, their findings convince the jury more than when they keep their hands on their knees or intertwine their fingers. It is curious to note the fact that when the prosecutor folds his hands in the "house" during the speech of his witness, the credibility of the testimony increases, because the jury thinks that the defense lawyer agrees with the witness's statements. On the other hand, when a jury sees a witness twisting or wringing fingers, they usually consider this behavior a sign of nervousness or may even suspect him of lying (unfortunately, this happens quite often). It is important to note that this behavior is equally common for both honest and dishonest people, and therefore these gestures cannot be automatically considered signs of deception. Nevertheless, I advise all witnesses to either fold their hands in a "house" or to join the folded hands without intertwining fingers, as these gestures appear more authentic, confident and natural.

Hands folded like a house and at the right level can be used to positively influence people. This gesture is capable of expressing such a high degree of confidence and firmness that it becomes difficult for people to challenge the person who is using such a non-verbal signal. The deliberate habit of folding your arms into the house can be very helpful. In particular, lecturers and salespeople should use this gesture more often when they want to be especially convincing, and everyone else should use this gesture more often when they want to emphasize the meaning of what was said. Also, think about how confidence gestures can help you during job interviews, presenting ideas in meetings, or simply in frank conversations with friends.

Too often in professional meetings, I notice women fold their fingers in a "house" under the table or very low. In fact, they own hands undermine their confidence. It is my hope that recognizing the power of this gesture as an indicator of confidence, competence, and toughness — qualities necessary to earn recognition — will help these women continue to display this reliable weapon over the table.

EXPRESSIVE THUMBING SIGNALS

It is very interesting for me to observe how verbal language sometimes mirrors non-verbal language. When film critics evaluate a film with both thumbs up, it means they are confident in its quality. Thumbs up is almost always a non-verbal sign of confidence. Moreover, it is associated with high status. Look at the photographs of John F Kennedy and note how often he kept his hands in his pockets with his thumbs outward (see Figure 51). His brother Bobby did the same. Lawyers, college professors, and doctors often grip the lapels of their jackets with their thumbs up. One large national network of model and portrait photography studios requires its masters to make sure that women in their photographs hold at least one hand on the collar and put their thumb up. Obviously, the marketers of this company are well aware that thumbs up is an expressive sign of confidence and high status.

Demonstrating confidence and high status

When people point their thumbs up, it means that they think highly of themselves and / or are confident that they are right and where they are (see Figures 52 and 53). Thumbs up is another example of gravity-defying non-verbal behavior commonly associated with states of comfort and confidence.

NS The interlacing of the fingers expresses uncertainty in all cases except one - when the thumbs are pointing straight up. It is noted that people who use expressive signals from the thumbs are distinguished by discernment, observation and ingenuity. Observe those who have a habit of throwing thumbs up and see how well they fit this description. Under normal circumstances, people rarely exhibit thumbs up, and therefore, when they do, it is safe to assume that such expressive behavior indicates positive feelings.

Demonstrating insecurity and low status

Rice. 54. Thumbs in trouser pockets are a sign of insecurity and low status. Those in authority should avoid this non-verbal expression of weakness.

The feeling of insecurity manifests itself when a person (usually a man) sticks their thumbs into the pockets of their trousers, and leaves the rest hanging at the sides (see Fig. 54). When a person applying for a job behaves this way, it indicates that he strongly doubts his chances. People with leadership or influence do not allow themselves to be shown to be weak in the service. A person of high standing can demonstrate such a gesture somewhere on vacation, but he will never do it if he is "on duty." This position of the thumbs is almost always an expressive sign of insecurity and weakness.

Thumb signals are so accurate that they can be successfully used to recognize those who are pleased with themselves AND those who are struggling to make ends meet. I have seen more than once how at trials people began their speech confidently and folded their hands in a "house", but after the first difficult question, their thumbs ended up in their pockets. This behavior of the thumbs is reminiscent of the behavior of a child who stands in front of an upset mother and shows how quickly a firm belief in his righteousness can give way to complete confusion.

Framing the genitals

Sometimes men subconsciously plug their thumbs into the belt on both sides of the fly and either pull up their pants or leave

Confidence signals express an extremely comfortable state of the brain. Certain hand signs of confidence show us that the person is quite happy and satisfied with the current state of affairs.

Hands "house"

The joining of the hands in a “house” is perhaps the most expressive emblem of complete confidence in one’s rightness and strength of the position (see Fig. 49). The gesture consists in connecting the tips of the straightened fingers of both hands and is similar to the position of the hands during prayer, differing only in that the bases of the fingers are spread apart and the palms do not touch. It is called a "house" because the hands form a kind of peaked roof of a church building. In the United States, women hold their hands low when performing this gesture (usually at waist level), which is sometimes difficult to spot. Men tend to fold their arms in a "house" at chest level, which makes the gesture more noticeable and expressive.

Rice. 49. By connecting our fingertips, we form a “house” that is one of the most expressive signs of confidence in our repertoire.

Hands folded like a "house" means that you are confident in your opinion or position. This gesture makes people clearly understand your attitude towards the issue under discussion and warns that you are ready to stubbornly defend your point of view. High-status people (lawyers, judges, doctors) often incorporate house-jointed fingers into their daily expressive repertoire to emphasize self-confidence and superiority. From time to time, this gesture is used by each of us, but the whole difference is how often and in what form. Some people do it all the time, others rarely, and still others modify the gesture (for example, they connect only straightened index fingers and thumbs, and the rest are intertwined). Someone folds their hands in a "house" under the table, someone high in front of them, and some even over their heads.

Those who do not know anything about the non-verbal meaning of this expressive gesture can keep their hands "house" for a long time, especially in favorable situations for themselves. And even when people know perfectly well that this gesture betrays their condition, it is still difficult for them to hide it. The limbic brain brings this reaction to such a degree of automatism that it is extremely difficult to suppress it, especially in a state of arousal, when a person forgets about the need to monitor and control their actions.

Circumstances can quickly change and make adjustments to our attitude towards events and people. In such cases, a fraction of a second is enough for us to turn a gesture of complete confidence into a demonstration of uncertainty. If our confidence is shaken or a seed of doubt appears in the brain, then our fingers, connected by the "house", can instantly intertwine and bring our hands into a prayer position (see Fig. 50). These changes in non-verbal behavior occur very quickly and accurately reflect our instantaneous spontaneous responses to changing events. A person can repeatedly change the position of his fingers, then connecting them with a "house" (a sign of confidence), then intertwining them (a sign of uncertainty). These changes accurately reflect the ongoing struggle between confidence and doubt, with varying degrees of success.

Rice. 50. Interlocking our fingers is a versatile way to show that we are stressed or anxious.

Folded hands convince the jury

The power of non-verbal behavior can be verified by studying the effect of the gesture of joining hands "house" in different social conditions. This gesture is useful for witnesses in the courtroom, it is even specifically recommended for those who act as expert witnesses. Hands folded like a house emphasize important points and confirm the expert's confidence in what he is saying. When examiners behave in this way, their findings convince the jury more than when they keep their hands on their knees or intertwine their fingers. It is curious to note the fact that when the prosecutor folds his hands in the "house" during the speech of his witness, the credibility of the testimony increases, because the jury thinks that the defense lawyer agrees with the witness's statements. On the other hand, when a jury sees a witness twisting or wringing fingers, they usually consider this behavior a sign of nervousness or may even suspect him of lying (unfortunately, this happens quite often). It is important to note that this behavior is equally common for both honest and dishonest people, and therefore these gestures cannot be automatically considered signs of deception. Nevertheless, I advise all witnesses to either fold their hands in a "house" or to join the folded hands without intertwining fingers, as these gestures appear more authentic, confident and natural.

Hands folded like a house and at the right level can be used to positively influence people. This gesture is capable of expressing such a high degree of confidence and firmness that it becomes difficult for people to challenge the person who is using such a non-verbal signal. The deliberate habit of folding your arms into the house can be very helpful. In particular, lecturers and salespeople should use this gesture more often when they want to be especially convincing, and everyone else should use this gesture more often when they want to emphasize the meaning of what was said. Also, think about how confidence gestures can help you during job interviews, presenting ideas in meetings, or simply in frank conversations with friends.