Home Mushrooms What does it mean to announce coming out. What does coming out mean in simple words. Beloved Gandalf from The Lord of the Rings - Sir Ian McKellen

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What does it mean to announce coming out. What does coming out mean in simple words. Beloved Gandalf from The Lord of the Rings - Sir Ian McKellen

"), With whom she worked on the film" Bloodrain ". At that time, the general public clapped the signal, but in 2013 Michelle made a full-fledged come-out, talking about her love preferences to a national publication. Now the fried news was appreciated: it was not re-posted or discussed only by the lazy. And early next year, Rodriguez officially announced her relationship with British model Cara Delevingne, adding: "She is cool, and we are doing well." And the truth, it seems, is nothing to worry about: while the famous franchises with her participation continue to bring money, Hollywood is unlikely to dismiss Michelle so easily.

Shot from the movie "Starship Troopers"

Today everyone already knows that Neil Patrick Harris prefers men: the actor furnished his coming-out with a pretentious takeaway to magazine covers and perfectly monetized it, having covered the slippery topic in "A Christmas of Harold and Kumar". But, of course, his young admirers did not know anything like that, bombarding Neil Patrick with letters after the premiere of Starship Troopers, which made him a star. Today, all girls who, for some reason, are not yet aware of the state of affairs, can read an exhaustive explanation on the actor's website: “I am happy to dispel any rumors and speculations, declaring with all pride that I am one hundred percent gay, I lead a fulfilling life and happy working with wonderful people in a business that I love. " Judging by the fact that Harris' popularity has not dimmed over the years, most fans took his recognition for granted, but someone may never be able to watch "How I Met Your Mother" with the same feeling.

Still from the film "Show Winners"

Many people did not perceive Jane Lynch as a sexual object before, and her molestation of the protagonist of "The Forty-Year-Old Virgin" was perceived purely with humor (mainly due to the age of the actress), but everything began to look very different after the announcement of her lesbian marriage in 2010 -m. Although after the movie "Winners of the Show", in which Jane reduced "disguise" to a minimum, one could guess something. However, the gullible spectators did not see the forest behind the trees, judging that you never know who plays whom. The lesbian series with Jane's participation "Sex in another city" did not arouse their suspicion either. But sometimes a banana is just a banana.

Still from the movie "Wilde"

Without a doubt, actor, director, writer, screenwriter and blogger Stephen Fry is one of the most famous gay men of all time. It is no coincidence that he played another famous gay Oscar Wilde in the film "Wilde" and was recognized as the best actor who managed to convey the image of the scandalous writer. In the same 1997, the British comedian also came out and published an extremely frank autobiographical book "Moab - my washing bowl", in which he spoke about his young years, marked by unsuccessful attempts to overcome his own homosexuality. Fry completely breaks the stereotype about gays as eternal sufferers, repulsed by society: you should look for a more humorist and merry fellow.

Having revealed the secret of his personal life to the world, he seems to have only benefited from this: offers from Hollywood are flying to his mail in batches, mixed with letters from fans, and his microblog entries every now and then bring down Twitter because of millions of readers who want to repost them (like not a single world newspaper can boast of the number of subscribers today). In 2013, the actor interviewed the Russian MP Vitaly Milonov, known for his homophobia, during which he notably trolled the latter. And at the beginning of this year, Fry also married - naturally, not a woman. The chosen one was stand-up comedian Elliot Spencer.

Shot from the movie "Super"

Ellen Page is one of the young actresses who make coming out look like beastly: her heterosexual roles in Juneau, Candy, Inception and Super were very compelling. In Super, Ellen even raped the main character, and in Juno she went pregnant - in general, nothing seemed to bode well ... But in 2014, everyone who made immodest fantasies about Ellen had to wipe themselves off: the actress announced its focus on the Time to Thrive LGBT youth conference. Paige is not yet at the age when her track record works for you, so her future is difficult to predict. But judging by the fact that now half a dozen films with her participation are being prepared for the release at once (and this is not counting the upcoming directorial debut), Ellen's near future looks rather cloudless.

Still from the movie "Star Trek: Retribution"

Coming outs are done in different ways. For Zachary Quinto, this happened much like Eminem in the comedy "Interview" - the confession just surfaced in the middle of the phrase. In 2011, the actor got into a conversation with a journalist for The New Yourk Times about the sensational suicide of a homosexual teenager and suddenly said: “Gay children should stop killing themselves because of the cruelty of others. Parents should teach their children the principles of respect and coexistence of people in this world. I hope we are facing a big transformation in the field of sexual culture. Jamie Rodemire's story changed me. His death made me regret that I had not come out earlier. Now I would like to serve as a catalyst of consciousness for at least one person in this world. " Soon the tabloids confirmed that Zachary has a boyfriend. Well, after all this, how do you order to look at the strong male friendship between Captains Kirk and Spock?

Still from the movie "Elysium - Heaven Not on Earth"

Foster's career began at the age of three with filming in commercials. In the 70s, having played a prostitute in "Taxi Driver", she moved to the rank of stars, and the famous role in "Silence of the Lambs" only consolidated this success. Jody earned two Oscars and two Golden Globes, besides many other awards, became a director, gave birth to two children from producer Sidney Bernard ... admitted that men were never interesting to her. It happened in 2013, and the following year, Foster married actress and photographer Alexandra Hedison. She does not plan new roles yet, but continues to work in directing.

A scene from the movie "The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey"

Ian McKellen is such a serious, sought-after and respected actor that he does not consider it necessary to hide and lead a double life. Colleagues on the theatrical stage, on which the Briton has shone since the late 50s, claim that they were always aware of his orientation; this fact was brought to the general public in an interview with BBC Radio 3 in 1988 (the actor himself claims that he just let it slip in the heat of radio debates, but, however, never regretted this act later).

In 1990, McKellen became one of the first openly gay men to be awarded a knighthood. All this did not interfere with the Hollywood career of an artist: Magneto and Gandalf, played many times by Sir Ian in the films of the X-Men and Lord of the Rings franchises, made him a favorite not only of Shakespeare fans, but also of young people around the world. And it seems that today no one is seriously concerned with the question of whether Gandalf should be considered gay (as, for example, Professor Dumbledore from "Harry Potter", which was declared as such by the writer J.K. Rowling). First of all, he is a great wizard, and everything else is the tenth thing.

Shot from the movie "Little Manhattan"

A scene from the film "Perfume: The Story of a Murderer"

British actor Ben Whishaw, famous for his role in the film adaptation of Patrick Suskind's novel "Perfumer", approached his coming out in stages: first, he played a gay on the stage and gave an interview to the gay magazine Out on this matter. The broad masses turned a blind eye to this. Then there was the role of a gay man in Lana and Andy Wachowski's "Cloud Atlas" - even the most incomprehensible ones have already combed themselves here, since the names of the directors were especially disposed to this. But this time, too, everyone wrote off the fact that “it's just the role”.

In 2013, Whishaw decided that it was useless to further fool the fans, and told the Daily Mail that he had been living with the Australian composer Mark Bradshaw, with whom he was married in Sydney, for a year. The moment for recognition was hardly chosen by chance: as noted by many publications that reprinted the news, when you are assigned the role of Q in such a franchise as "Bondiana", you can no longer be afraid of anything. Moreover, it is believed that it was the actor's recognition that helped him get the central role in the upcoming biopic about Freddie Mercury and Queen. Whishaw, however, has since then preferred to communicate with journalists through his agent.

Shot from the film "Prisoners"

Even if Maria Bello was not your favorite actress, she played so many on-screen husbands that it was difficult to suspect her of love for women. But everything happens for the first time: in 2013, the "Captive" star came out, writing an article in The New York Times about her relationship with journalist Claire Mann. The arguments were serious: tired of lying to the growing up son, and the deceased husband, although a very close person, was still more of a platonic partner. “I like my modern family. Maybe, in the end, such a modern family is just a more honest family, ”the actress emphasized, not denying that recognition can hit her film career. The son, it should be noted, accepted the situation with full understanding. As for the benevolence of Hollywood producers, this issue is not yet clear.

Promotional frame for the series "Escape"

They did not expect? And yet! The star of the series "Escape", who had a romantic relationship with a prison nurse, was silent about his personal life until the last moment. He was forced out of the gloom only by an invitation to the St. Petersburg Film Forum in 2013, which Wentworth was forced to reject due to the newly adopted "anti-gay law." His decision, initially explained by a busy work schedule, he later commented in more detail in a letter published on a well-known LGBT website: "I cannot come to a country where it is impossible to openly love." Because - yes, precisely because. Not only Russian viewers, but also Miller's American fans were shocked by this confession. Meanwhile, the actor does not deny that he has Russian roots, and he has been to Russia several times before. But the public position so far outweighs everything else.

Still from the movie "Best Friend's Wedding"

Times change, morals change too. Today, in the West, it is much easier to announce one's unconventional orientation than it was in the 1980s. In 1989, the star of Quiet Don, Best Friend and Best Friend's Weddings, Rupert Everett, admitted in an interview with the French press that he was homosexual. The actor's name was immediately taken up by the tabloids and made a bargaining chip in the debate about whether gay can be successful in heterosexual roles. The Briton was one of the first who pulled this topic out and forced it to be discussed - for which many of the younger defendants of this top should, in theory, thank him. However, the career of Everett himself, after the famous recognition, noticeably stalled: according to the actor, the scandalous fame cost him the main male role in Basic Instinct and a number of other high-profile films.

Today, he seems to regret his rushing to come-out, and does not stop berating himself for the missed opportunities. “I wanted to be a movie star,” Rupert said in a recent interview, stressing that as an actor he doesn't care who he plays. - But in my case it did not work out - being gay, it is impossible to do this. It doesn't work with gays. " Well, the fact that the film industry has stopped listing Everett as a woman's heartbreaker, you can, perhaps, agree. Nevertheless, many believe that Everett is needlessly pitying: he firmly established himself in Hollywood, his best films came out much later than the scandalous interviews, he was awarded nominations for many prestigious film awards, fresh films with his participation are released every year ... And in between, he also makes good money on their own memoirs. Anyway, ok, Rupert! Should you complain about fate?

Promotional frame for the TV series "Ellie McBeal"

The Australian-American film actress Portia de Rossi, who is remembered for her many roles in the television series Ellie McBeal and Arrested Development, was actually married in the 90s. But today it is already known that it was a fictitious marriage with the aim of obtaining a green card - and everything was clear to Porsha's parents before, because she told them at school that she liked girls, and somehow not very guys. The actress came out in 2010, admitting that she had been married for two years to TV presenter Ellen Lee DeGeneres, whom she began dating in 2004 (DeGeneres herself revealed the truth about her orientation back in 1997 on the Oprah show). Probably, looking at how easy everything turned out for Porsche, in 2012 her television colleague Jim Parsons or Leo DiCaprio decided on public recognition? Judging by where the Hollywood wind is blowing, there will still be.

As a kind of concept of emancipation. He believed that the secretive existence of minorities reduced their ability to influence public opinion, and therefore encouraged homosexuals to become more visible by coming out.

Therapist Iwan Bloch, in his work of the year entitled "The Sexual Life of Our Time and Its Relationship to Modern Civilization," asked older homosexuals to come out for heterosexual family members and acquaintances.

The first significant person to come out in America was the poet Robert Duncan. After announcing his orientation in the year, he was discharged from the army shortly after being drafted. In a year under his real name in an anarchist journal Politics, he declared that homosexuals were an oppressed minority.

The formerly clandestine Mattachin Society, founded by Harry Hay and others in the Los Angeles presidential campaign of the year for Wallace's nominee, also came to the public eye when San Francisco led the group. gay men Hal Call, Ken Burns and Don Lucas stood up.

Other people who hide their sexual orientation do not have any heterosexual contact and simply want to protect themselves from discrimination or rejection by hiding their sexual orientation or desires. M. Beilkin states: “to understand the motivation of such behavior, special knowledge is not required. We are talking about the forced submission of a homosexual to the social rules of a society that does not at all encourage sexual dissent. "

The coming out process

foreboding differences from other people that occur in a person before puberty;
doubt heterosexual identity during adolescence;
Adoption their non-traditional identity, which may not be achieved due to hostile social attitudes;
identification yourself as a representative of sexual minorities, establishing a connection between sexuality and emotionality, integrating your sexuality into the “I” image.

Since no specific "reasons" for the formation of the sexual identity of homosexuals have been found, the process of coming-out itself and its theoretical foundations are controversial: none of the developed models can be considered exhaustive. Nevertheless, they agree on one thing: the process is not linear, and a person can simultaneously solve several psychological problems related to different stages of the process.

Awareness of one's own orientation

The psychological model of the coming-out process, developed by Eli Coleman, assumes the presence of the so-called "pre-detection" stage, preceding the coming-out, in which the child begins to feel different from his peers in early childhood, as well as the emerging conflict of his feelings with those learned in the family. negative attitudes towards homosexuality. At this stage, many people are unable to explain what is wrong with their attraction to the same sex, and feel their difference from others long before they relate it to their belonging to sexual minorities.

Therapist Henley-Heckenbrück emphasizes that

"Individual nuances of the definition [ human] its identity is difficult to enumerate. They are determined by personality traits and character, the age when a person first became aware of his otherness, the peculiarities of the course of physical processes, the rigidity of family views (in particular those related to sexual behavior), religious upbringing, negative or traumatic experiences associated with sexual orientation. "

The age of awareness of their homosexual experiences for gays and lesbians is different. According to observations carried out by researchers Jay and Young, for men this age is 13-14 years, and for women - 18. Most men begin to have sexual intercourse with people of the same gender even before they realize they are gay. Women, on the other hand, usually guess about their orientation long before entering into intimacy with persons of the same sex.

Coming out can be preceded by a period of uncertainty, when a person believes that his sexual orientation, behavior or sense of belonging to the opposite sex is a kind of transitory "phase", or rejects these feelings for religious or moral reasons.

Psychological and social problems of coming out

Coming out is a complex process that can have both positive and negative social and psychological consequences for the individual who commits it. In this regard, people who have already come out and determined by trial and error which behavior is the least traumatic for the person himself and his loved ones, tried to generalize this experience in the form of recommendations. Parents and Friends of Gay and Lesbians (PFLAG), an American organization, discourage, in particular, coming out during holidays and other stressful situations, such as quarrels.

Usually, coming out is not a one-step process, but a gradual, developing process. In most cases, sexologists recommend that you “open up” first to a trusted friend or family member, and then take a break, postponing further confessions. Some people know about their orientation at work, but they are not suspected of being in the family, or vice versa. However, actually coming out is not limited to a one-time confession to one person or group of people.

Some researchers have found that the degree of a person's openness about their orientation in different life situations is directly related to the absence of stress and neuroses.

Parents' attitude towards coming out

For parents on a number of websites, as well as in other publications, various psychological recommendations are presented on how to adequately relate to the coming out of a child.

National coming out day

According to the American LGBT organization "Campaign for Human Rights", the so-called "National Day of Coming Out" is called upon to consistently and orderly implement the concept of coming out on the scale of the whole society. It is held annually on October 11th. Initially, this event was held only in the USA, and then spread throughout the world. According to the organizers, it helps to reduce the possible negative consequences of a come-out both for the psyche of a person's relatives, friends and relatives, and for himself.

History

The history of the American "National Coming Out Day" dates back to October 11, when 500,000 protesters marched through the streets of Washington in a sign of demand for equal rights for gays and lesbians. The decision to hold an annual come-out day was made during the year with the participation of Dr. Robert Eichberg and Jean O "Leary, an American gay and lesbian rights activist, politician and former nun. The founders of the event set the goal of acquainting the majority of the population with the LGBT community and its movement for equal rights.

Symbols and attributes

National Coming Out Day emblem by artist Keith Haring

The emblem of the American coming-out day was created by the American artist Keith Haring, who became famous in the 1980s, who worked in the genres of urban street graphics, graffiti and pop art. In many of his works, the themes of same-sex relationships were played up.

The organizers of the event recommend that participants on this day wear certain signs or symbols: an inverted pink triangle, the Greek letter "lambda", as well as a 6-color rainbow in the form of jewelry, flags or on clothes, in order to clearly demonstrate the presence of gays, lesbians, bisexuals by their example and transsexuals in all walks of life, across all ages and ethnic groups.

The famous hit “I’m Coming Out”, performed by American pop star Diana Ross, can be considered the unofficial anthem of the day of coming out in particular and the entire gay community in general. It was composed and produced by composer Nile Rodgers in collaboration with other musicians, inspired by a party in a California disco club, where he once saw several transvestites imitating Diana. After the song was released in the spring of the year and firmly took the top lines of the charts (the highest position - 5th in the Billboard music magazine), Diana Ross became a gay icon of the LGBT community along with such artists as Madonna, Gloria Gaynor, Cher, Kylie Minogue, Barbra Streisand, Judy Garland, Marlene Dietrich and Shirley Bassey.

Support

The National Coming Out Day is patronized by one of the largest LGBT organizations called the Campaign for Human Rights. She publishes special materials with recommendations on how to correctly approach the issue of disclosing one's own orientation to relatives, relatives and friends. The organization also disseminates data on which companies and corporations are most tolerant of LGBT employees at work (the so-called "Corporate Equality Index").

Celebrity coming out

Britney Spears' scandalous kiss (left) and Madonna (right) at the 2003 MTV Video Music Awards

Coming out is most noticeable among popular people, whose personal life is constantly in the spotlight of the media. These are mainly representatives of creative professions: ballet dancers, pop singers, designers, actors, directors, etc. However, some extremists also come out, for example, British neo-Nazi Nikki Crane, who died of AIDS, confessed shortly before his death. in their homosexuality.

There is a point of view that even non-gay, lesbian or bisexual pop culture representatives resort to fake come-out in the form of “sensational revelations” or public actions as a means of increasing public interest in their person (for example, the Russian group Tatu "Using a lesbian image early in her career, and singer Madonna, kissing Christina Aguilera and Britney Spears on the lips while performing" Like A Virgin "at the MTV Video Music Awards of the year).

The case of the British pop singer George Michael illustrates the exact opposite reaction of the public: his public recognition in a year of his own orientation alienated some of his fans from his work, as a result of which the singer's popularity in the United States fell sharply, which was one of the reasons for his prolonged depression and creative crisis. ...

Ballet dancers

Musicians, singers

Actors

Designers

Politicians

The cover of Time magazine, April 14, 1997, in which TV presenter Ellen De Generys confessed she was a lesbian

Journalists and TV presenters

Writers

Athletes

Social relevance and influence

The result of the implementation of the concept of coming-out within the framework of public programs (in particular, the almost 20-year annual celebration of the day of coming out and a number of other events to reduce the level of homophobia in the United States) was the fact that an Internet survey of almost 3 thousand Americans revealed : 70% of heterosexuals aged 18 and over know personally someone who is gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender (for comparison, in Russia, according to statistics from the Public Opinion Foundation, this figure is 10%). Moreover, 83% of those people who consider themselves members of the LGBT community in the United States reported that they do not hide their orientation.

Another multi-year study based on 120 opinion polls, conducted by political science professor Kenneth Sherrill of the Center for Sexuality and Public Policy at Hunter College and co-authored with Patrick Egan of the Center for Democratic Policy at Princeton University, found that having a family member who is openly gay or lesbian, increased public support for registering gay partnerships by 17% and improved public attitudes towards adoption of children by gay couples by 13%.

Coming out theme in works of art

Some fictional works discuss the situation when a heterosexual character makes a "fake coming out", identifying himself as an LGBT community for the sake of fame, money or some other preference. In the future, the situation repeats itself, and later he performs the same "come-out procedure", but only in the LGBT community itself, publicly declaring that he is heterosexual. For example, the film Tango Threesome was dedicated to a similar problem, and in Francis Weber's comedy The Chameleon, the hero of Daniel Auteuy makes a fake coming-out so as not to lose his job (he works as an accountant at a condom manufacturing enterprise, among whose clients there are a lot of homosexuals ). In the anime "Strawberry Eggs", the student publicly admitted that she fell in love with her teacher, who was then publicly revealed as a guy in disguise.

The theme of teenagers coming out is also raised in the Krampack film.

Criticism

The largest Christian organization "Exodus International", which is part of the anti-homosexual movement, in response to the "National Day of Coming Out" launched the celebration of its own "National Day to End Homosexuality" ( National Coming Out of Homosexuality Day) in honor of "the changed lives of former homosexuals - several thousand men and women." The organization’s president, Alan Chambers, states: “As one of these thousands of people who have experienced change, I know that there is a life beyond homosexuality. For many of those who feel loneliness and emptiness in their homosexual life, there is a way out. "

John Paulk, "ex-gay" and organizer of regular anti-homosexual conferences called "Love Won Out" sponsored by family values advocate Focus on the Family, says : “To millions of people concerned about the problems [ homosexuality], they say that coming out is the solution to their problems. But for some, this is just the beginning, and we want them to know that there is a way out of the emptiness, loneliness and confusion experienced by many in homosexual life. "

Anti-gay activist Mike Haley, "ex-homosexual" and host of Love Overcome conferences, states: "Hundreds of thousands of people struggling with their sexuality, including young people at risk, are being pushed to come out. as a means of solving their problems. People need truthful information to make healthy life decisions, and so-called “pride” events are regrettable in this regard. The truth is that there is a way out for those struggling with unwanted homosexuality. "

Therapist Warren Throckmorton, assistant professor of psychology at Grove City College, Pennsylvania, USA, responds to questions from teenagers who have doubts about their orientation and sexual identity, says they do not need to rush to come out and "hang out on themselves shortcuts ":" You yourself may not know exactly how to name your sexual feelings. You should not make a hasty decision about which category of people you belong to. This is true for both adolescence and later life of young people. Some well-intentioned people, teachers or counselors may claim that young people come out and identify with gays and lesbians as early as 12-13 years old. While there are some teens who are in a rush to take this step, it is actually unwise. Sexual feelings develop over an extended period of time [...] The sex hormones of adolescents are more active than ever, so your sexual feelings can be extremely strong, but not focused on one thing. This is fine".

Feminist criticism

The concept of coming out has also been criticized by some in the LGBT community. In particular, feminist Judith Butler says that the metaphor opposing a person's states "inside" and "outside the closet" implies that life "in the closet" or in the shadows is a dark, marginal and false existence, then how life "outside", "in the beams of spotlights" reveals the true essence of man. American feminist theorist Diana Fuss explains: “The problem, of course, is the 'inside-outside' rhetoric: this controversy overlooks the fact that most of us are both 'inside' at the same time. and "outside" ". Fass continues: “to be 'outside', or 'in sight,' as gay people say, actually means exactly the opposite; “To be outside” means to finally stop being constrained by external circumstances, as well as by all the exceptions and deprivations caused by being “inside”. In other words, “being outside” is actually being inside. Inside a visible, articulated and rational cultural space ”.

Gender and feminist theorist Eve Kosofsky Sedgwick in his 1990 book " Closet epistemology”On the basis of literary heroes analyzes in detail the perception in modern society of the phenomenon of male homosexuality and of the“ closet ”itself, which homosexuals“ leave ”. Kosofki criticizes the strict division between heterosexuality and homosexuality, as well as the thesis that a homosexual is a kind of separate type of person whose sexuality turns out to be "contagious." The author admits that, perhaps, in every man, as in a "closet", there is a "woman's heart" and that this is not a characteristic of some "species" or "minority", but rather one of many possible possibilities. The author comes to the conclusion that the “closet”, perceived as a kind of secret, private homosexuality, is in fact a public entity, and the “exit” from it performs the function of a kind of “performance” or “show”. Denying the opposition of the private and the public, Kosovsky in his reasoning comes not to the fact that homosexuals carry out "exit from the closet", but to the discovery of the fact that in fact the "closet" is "transparent" or "empty". Thus, homosexuals, according to Kosofka, turn out to be only a “hastily formed group of men” for “ostentatious” purposes.

Notes (edit)

Constitution of the Russian Federation, Article 23 "Everyone has the right to inviolability of private life, personal and family secrets, protection of his honor and good name."
"Tatu" in the lesbian wilderness... Moscow's comsomolets. No. 46, December 22, 2000
Johansson, Warren & Percy, William A. Outing: Shattering the Conspiracy of Silence. Harrington Park Press, 1994
Gross, Larry. "Contested Closets: The Politics and Ethics of Outing." Minneapolis & London, University of Minneapolis Press, 1993
Meeker, Martin " Behind the Mask of Respectability: Reconsidering the Mattachine Society and Male Homophile Practice, 1950s and 1960s". Journal of the History of Sexuality - Volume 10, Number 1, January 2001, pp. 78-116
Paul Varnell. " Revising early gay history". October 2, 2002, Chicago Free Press
Hooker, Evelyn. Male Homosexuals and Their Worlds. Sexual Inversion: The Multiple Roots of Homosexuality. Judd Marmor, ed. New York: Basic Books, 1965, pp. 83-107.
Gay pioneer's papers enter Library of Congress
M. M. Beilkin. “Gordian knot of sexology. Polemic Notes on Same-Sex Attraction ", pp. 89-91
Ericson, E. (1946) "Ego development and historical change." The Psychoanalitic Study of the Child, 2: 359-96
Davis D., Neil Ch. Pink Psychotherapy: A Guide to Working with Sexual Minorities, St. Petersburg: Peter, 2001, ISBN 5-318-00036-3
Grace, J. (1977) "Gay despair and the loss of adolescence: a new perspective on same sex preference and self-esteem." Presented at 5th Biennial Professional Symposium of the National Association of Social Workers, San Diego, November
de Monteflores, C. and Schultz, S.J. (1978) Coming out. Journal of Social Issues, 34 (3): 59-72
Kimmel, D.C. (1978) "Adult development and aging: a gay perspective." Journal of Social Issues, 34 (3): 113-30
Cass V.C. (1979) "Homosexual identity formation: a theoretical model." Journal of Homosexuality, 4: 219-35
Troiden, R.R. (1979) Becoming homosexual: a model of gay idetity acquisition. Psychiatry, 42 (4): 362-73
Woodman, N.J. and Lenna, H.R. (1980) Counseling with Gay Men and Women: A Guide for facilitating Positive Lifestyles. San Francisco, CA: Jossey Bass
Coleman, E. (1981/82) "Development stages of the coming out process." Journal of Homosexuality, 7: 31-43
MacDonald, G.J. (1982) "Individual differences in the coming out process of gay men: implications for theoretical models." Journal of Homosexuality, 8 (1): 47-60
Minton, H. and MacDonald, G. J. (1983/84) "Homosexual identity formation as a development process." Journal of Homosexuality, 9 (2/3): 91-104
R. R. Troiden (1989). "The formation of homosexual identities". Journal of Homosexuality, vol. 17, No. 1/2/3/4, pp. 43-74.
Jay, K. and Young, A. (1979) "The Gay Report: Lesbians and Gay Men Speak Out About Sexual Experiences and Lifestyle." New York: Simon and Shuster
Hanley-Hackenbruck, P. "Psychotherapy and the 'coming out' process". Journal of Gay and Lesbian Psychotherapy, 1 (1): 21-39
Weinberg, T. (1978) "On doing and being gay: Sexual behavior and male self-identity." Journal of Homosexuality, 4: 143-56
19 tips for a successful come-out
Eight Tips for Coming Out
http://www.pflag.org/fileadmin/user_upload/holiday_tips.pdf
Kon, I. “Moonlight at Dawn. Faces and Masks of Same-Sex Love ”. Part III. Me and Others - Finding Myself
Evelyn Hooker, "The adjustment of the male overt homosexual", Journal of projective techniques, XXI 1957, pp. 18-31
Answers to Your Questions About Sexual Orientation and Homosexuality // American Psychological Association FAQ
T. B. Dmitrieva, Director of the "V.P. Serbsky Center for Social and Forensic Psychiatry", Academician of the Russian Academy of Medical Sciences, Doctor of Medical Sciences, Professor, in her work "Guide to Forensic Psychiatry" (2004) writes: "Modern official Russian psychiatry opposes any psychiatric treatment, both "conversion" and "restorative" therapy, based on the premise that homosexuality is itself a mental illness, or on the premise that the patient must be willing to change his sexual orientation. As for practice, not a single case is known that psychiatric or drug treatment in this area has a positive result. Sexual, sensual, emotional experiences of a person are artificially unchangeable. "
The average age of a logout is 13 years
Dale O "Leary. Gay Teens and Attempted Suicide
Teen suicide
Excerpt from the book Miletski, Hani. Understanding Bestiality and Zoophilia. East-West Publishing, LLC, 2002, ISBN 0-9716917-0-3
Pet-abuse.com: Admitted zoophile beaten by father with crowbar
Richard Dyer (2002). "The Culture of Queers". ISBN 0-415-22376-8
Blood & Honor - Britain's fascists split
Oi! - The Truth by Garry Bushell
Jim DeRogatis. Kiss them off. Chicago Sun-Times, Aug 29, 2003

Coming out- the process of voluntary open recognition of one's belonging to a particular sexual orientation or gender minority. Translated from English “get out of the closet” or just “get out”. Usually people perform this act in order to reveal themselves as a person and stop hiding their real orientation. It should be understood that coming out will not hide from oppression and discrimination.

Outing- the process of forcibly disclosing a person's sexual orientation without his permission, disclosing personal information about a person.

Glass cabinet- this is also another term associated with the LGBT community, it characterizes a person who is used to being associated with any orientation, but he did not openly come out.

How to come out?

Try to understand who will not judge you and understand.
Tell your parents or close friends first, start small. Also, it can be various forums or people who have already come out, or you can shoot a video for the Internet, the main thing is not to be afraid to ask for advice.
Feel the soil.
Do not talk about your orientation in a homophobic environment, start from afar, ask your loved ones for their opinion about the LGBT community. Don't be dependent on your parents in case they get angry or abandon you.
All life is little come-outs.
You will encounter this every day, for example if you go out to dinner with your couple or book a hotel room. Your parents will also come out telling their friends about your sexual orientation.
Be prepared for criticism.
There will always be evil people, so just be calm and always respond constructively to criticism or do not notice it at all, never be offended, give only love. Understand everything depends on the personal upbringing of a person, it does not depend on race, gender or nation.
Think about whether it is really necessary.
Don't be hasty. Think about the pluses and minuses it will bring, whether it is possible to do without it or it will become easier for you mentally. Will you be happy or confused?
Are you ready.
First of all, you must love yourself, and then demand this from the world around you. Remember that there will always be people who will support you and help you with advice or a kind word.
Do not be afraid.
Be strong and confident in yourself, it's okay if you face intolerance, every person has gone through this in a certain sense. The main thing is to love yourself.

He believed that the secretive existence of minorities reduced their ability to influence public opinion, and therefore encouraged homosexuals to become more visible by coming out.

The coming out process

foreboding differences from other people that occur in a person before puberty;
doubt heterosexual identity during adolescence;
Adoption their non-traditional identity, which may not be achieved due to hostile social attitudes;
identification yourself as a representative of sexual minorities, establishing a connection between sexuality and emotionality, integrating your sexuality into the “I” image.

Awareness of one's own orientation

Therapist Henley-Heckenbrück emphasizes that

"Individual nuances of the definition [ human] its identity is difficult to enumerate. They are determined by personality traits and character, the age when a person first became aware of his otherness, the peculiarities of the course of physical processes, the rigidity of family views (in particular those related to sexual behavior), religious upbringing, negative or traumatic experiences associated with sexual orientation. "

Psychological and social problems of coming out

Some researchers have found that the degree of a person's openness about their orientation in different life situations is directly related to the absence of stress and neuroses.

Parents' attitude towards coming out

For parents on a number of websites, as well as in other publications, various psychological recommendations are presented on how to adequately relate to the coming out of a child.

National coming out day

History

Symbols and attributes

National Coming Out Day emblem by artist Keith Haring

Support

Celebrity coming out

Britney Spears' scandalous kiss (left) and Madonna (right) at the 2003 MTV Video Music Awards

Ballet dancers

Musicians, singers

Actors

Designers

Politicians

The cover of Time magazine, April 14, 1997, in which TV presenter Ellen De Generys confessed she was a lesbian

Journalists and TV presenters

Writers

Athletes

Social relevance and influence

Coming out theme in works of art

The theme of teenagers coming out is also raised in the Krampack film.

Criticism

Feminist criticism

Notes (edit)

Constitution of the Russian Federation, Article 23 "Everyone has the right to inviolability of private life, personal and family secrets, protection of his honor and good name."
"Tatu" in the lesbian wilderness... Moscow's comsomolets. No. 46, December 22, 2000
Johansson, Warren & Percy, William A. Outing: Shattering the Conspiracy of Silence. Harrington Park Press, 1994
Gross, Larry. "Contested Closets: The Politics and Ethics of Outing." Minneapolis & London, University of Minneapolis Press, 1993
Meeker, Martin " Behind the Mask of Respectability: Reconsidering the Mattachine Society and Male Homophile Practice, 1950s and 1960s". Journal of the History of Sexuality - Volume 10, Number 1, January 2001, pp. 78-116
Paul Varnell. " Revising early gay history". October 2, 2002, Chicago Free Press
Hooker, Evelyn. Male Homosexuals and Their Worlds. Sexual Inversion: The Multiple Roots of Homosexuality. Judd Marmor, ed. New York: Basic Books, 1965, pp. 83-107.
Gay pioneer's papers enter Library of Congress
M. M. Beilkin. “Gordian knot of sexology. Polemic Notes on Same-Sex Attraction ", pp. 89-91
Ericson, E. (1946) "Ego development and historical change." The Psychoanalitic Study of the Child, 2: 359-96
Davis D., Neil Ch. Pink Psychotherapy: A Guide to Working with Sexual Minorities, St. Petersburg: Peter, 2001, ISBN 5-318-00036-3
Grace, J. (1977) "Gay despair and the loss of adolescence: a new perspective on same sex preference and self-esteem." Presented at 5th Biennial Professional Symposium of the National Association of Social Workers, San Diego, November
de Monteflores, C. and Schultz, S.J. (1978) Coming out. Journal of Social Issues, 34 (3): 59-72
Kimmel, D.C. (1978) "Adult development and aging: a gay perspective." Journal of Social Issues, 34 (3): 113-30
Cass V.C. (1979) "Homosexual identity formation: a theoretical model." Journal of Homosexuality, 4: 219-35
Troiden, R.R. (1979) Becoming homosexual: a model of gay idetity acquisition. Psychiatry, 42 (4): 362-73
Woodman, N.J. and Lenna, H.R. (1980) Counseling with Gay Men and Women: A Guide for facilitating Positive Lifestyles. San Francisco, CA: Jossey Bass
Coleman, E. (1981/82) "Development stages of the coming out process." Journal of Homosexuality, 7: 31-43
MacDonald, G.J. (1982) "Individual differences in the coming out process of gay men: implications for theoretical models." Journal of Homosexuality, 8 (1): 47-60
Minton, H. and MacDonald, G. J. (1983/84) "Homosexual identity formation as a development process." Journal of Homosexuality, 9 (2/3): 91-104
R. R. Troiden (1989). "The formation of homosexual identities". Journal of Homosexuality, vol. 17, No. 1/2/3/4, pp. 43-74.
Jay, K. and Young, A. (1979) "The Gay Report: Lesbians and Gay Men Speak Out About Sexual Experiences and Lifestyle." New York: Simon and Shuster
Hanley-Hackenbruck, P. "Psychotherapy and the 'coming out' process". Journal of Gay and Lesbian Psychotherapy, 1 (1): 21-39
Weinberg, T. (1978) "On doing and being gay: Sexual behavior and male self-identity." Journal of Homosexuality, 4: 143-56
19 tips for a successful come-out
Eight Tips for Coming Out
http://www.pflag.org/fileadmin/user_upload/holiday_tips.pdf
Kon, I. “Moonlight at Dawn. Faces and Masks of Same-Sex Love ”. Part III. Me and Others - Finding Myself
Evelyn Hooker, "The adjustment of the male overt homosexual", Journal of projective techniques, XXI 1957, pp. 18-31
Answers to Your Questions About Sexual Orientation and Homosexuality // American Psychological Association FAQ
T. B. Dmitrieva, Director of the "V.P. Serbsky Center for Social and Forensic Psychiatry", Academician of the Russian Academy of Medical Sciences, Doctor of Medical Sciences, Professor, in her work "Guide to Forensic Psychiatry" (2004) writes: "Modern official Russian psychiatry opposes any psychiatric treatment, both "conversion" and "restorative" therapy, based on the premise that homosexuality is itself a mental illness, or on the premise that the patient must be willing to change his sexual orientation. As for practice, not a single case is known that psychiatric or drug treatment in this area has a positive result. Sexual, sensual, emotional experiences of a person are artificially unchangeable. "
The average age of a logout is 13 years
Dale O "Leary. Gay Teens and Attempted Suicide
Teen suicide
Excerpt from the book Miletski, Hani. Understanding Bestiality and Zoophilia. East-West Publishing, LLC, 2002, ISBN 0-9716917-0-3
Pet-abuse.com: Admitted zoophile beaten by father with crowbar
Richard Dyer (2002). "The Culture of Queers". ISBN 0-415-22376-8
Blood & Honor - Britain's fascists split
Oi! - The Truth by Garry Bushell
Jim DeRogatis. Kiss them off. Chicago Sun-Times, Aug 29, 2003
Barry Walters. Listen, without prejudice - pop musician George Michael "s professional life... The Advocate, May 12, 1998
Judy Wieder. All The Way Out George Michael... The Advocate, Jan 19, 1999
Rudolf Nureyev: the tragedy of the richest dancer // RIA Novosti
Italian writer wrote a book about 10 "great homosexual passions of the 20th century"
Claude Bernardin, Tom Stanton. Rocket Man: Elton John from A-Z... Praeger / Greenwood, 1996. ISBN 0-275-95698-9. Page 48.
Walters, Suzanna Danuta. All the Rage: The Story of Gay Visibility in America... University of Chicago Press, 2003. ISBN 0-226-87231-9. Page 4.
Burston, P. "Honestly". Attitude 1.4 (August 1994): pp. 62-69. http://www.glbtq.com/arts/pet_shop_boys.html

Not every person will dare to loudly and publicly declare their non-traditional sexual orientation. The story of Kevin Spacey's coming-out received a great response even in the United States, where homosexuality has long been perceived adequately. In Kazakhstan, one of the major movie theater chains used this story to advertise, offering an annual subscription to Kazakh actors who dare to follow Spacey's example and come out. However, so far no one has confessed. And the actors can be understood: coming out is a serious and important step for an LGBT person ..

# 1. What is coming out?

Coming out . - English)literally means "disclosure", "exit". This expression goes back to the phrase "Сoming out of the closet", that is, "out of the closet." From the same metaphorical closet in which LGBT people often sit, fearing public opinion.

The birth of coming out as a phenomenon is associated with the activities of fighters for the rights of sexual minorities in the mid-19th century and early and mid-20th century.

The idea of coming out dates back to Karl Heinrich Ulrichs, a German lawyer, journalist and inspirer of the LGBT rights movement. At one time, Ulrichs was dismissed from the district court in Hildesheim due to homosexuality.

He wrote a series of books " Investigation of the mystery of love between men ", in which he proposed a somewhat naive, romantic theory about" uranians ", people who are neither men nor women, but a kind of third sex. Ulrichs considered the love between them to be more sublime than the usual relationship between a man and a woman Despite the fact that Ulrichs mixed the concepts of gender identity and homosexuality in his work, LGBT people appreciate his contribution to the development of the idea of coming out. ”The scientific term coming out was made by the North American psychologist Evelyn Hooker, who studied the problems of sexual minorities.

The official coming-out day is October 11th. It was on this day in 1987 that 500,000 demonstrators marched through the streets of Washington in support of the rights of LGBT people.

Of course, coming out is usually associated with the LGBT community. But sometimes this concept is used in other contexts as well. For example, "coming out of an alcoholic", "coming out of an atheist" and even "coming out of a vampire".

# 2. Loudest coming-outs

Not only Kevin Spacey, but many other celebrities and even politicians have publicly admitted to being LGBT. In 1988, British actor Ian McKellen (many know him as Gandolph from "The Lord of the Rings") confessed to his homosexuality on the air of the radio station. In 2016, Twilight star Kristen Stewart announced she was bisexual.

In 2014, Apple CEO Tim Cook wrote in his column on Bloomberg Businessweek: “While I have never denied my orientation, until now I have never publicly admitted it. So let me be clear: I am proud to be gay and I consider homosexuality to be one of the greatest gifts that God has given me. "

Cumming-outs in different years were made by actress Judy Foster, singer Elton John and even the famous Angela Davis. On November 6, 2014, Latvian Foreign Minister Edgar Rinkevich wrote on his Twitter: "Proud to be gay".

No. 3. What is the point of coming out?

Opponents of coming-out or homophobic people usually say something like: "Do this quietly in the basement, why announce your preferences to everyone." Why is it so important for representatives of the LGBT movement to step out of the shadows? Human rights activists say that coming-out is necessary for a gay, lesbian, bisexual or person with a non-traditional gender identity to declare himself.

Visibility is a step towards legitimacy and acceptance. Thus, the revealed one emphasizes that he is a full-fledged representative of society, and draws attention to the problems of people with the same orientation as his. When someone well-known claims to be a member of the LGBT community, this has a particularly strong effect. Although in this case, we cannot exclude the element of PR and attracting attention.

LGBT-friendly psychologists emphasize the importance of coming out to combat stigma. This allows the one who steps out of the shadows to get rid of frustration, constant tension due to the need to hide. Also, coming out allows a person to feel more comfortable and accept himself as he is.

No. 4. Outing or violent coming out

Outing is when information about a person's sexual orientation becomes public against his will. That is, someone deliberately informs the environment of the LGBT representative about his orientation. This can be done in order to discredit a person if they are in a homophobic environment. Outing can be unintentional, for example, someone close to him saw the corresponding entries in a person's personal diary or unclosed messenger.

No. 5. How to correctly come out

Before coming out, make sure you are confident that it is really necessary at this stage in your life. Don't forget about your personal safety and consider how it can change your life. Remember the importance of a come-out, because you are doing it first of all for yourself, plus thereby expressing your civic position.

If you are going to come out in the family, for example, in front of your parents, then consider their attitude to the topic of homosexuality. If it is negative, then you should not declare your orientation suddenly and abruptly. To smoothly move on to this topic, perhaps you should first prepare the context and try to change the negative attitudes of a loved one. Let the parent read popular science literature about homosexuality or gender identity, watch a movie on this topic together. The one who is about to get out of the "closet" also does not hurt to get acquainted with the special literature in order to be able to answer questions if they arise.

Of course, the reaction of loved ones can be unpredictable, so if you are, for example, a minor, it is better to think in advance about where you can go to spend the night in the worst case scenario.

If you intend to come out in front of colleagues, then also weigh the pros and cons. It may be worth starting with a limited number of people with whom you have a good relationship, rather than making a speakerphone announcement.

It is recommended that you refrain from coming out at work if it could pose a serious danger to you, for example, the prospect of losing your job, or it could have a serious impact on your professional life.

Coming out should be done in a sober memory and sane mind, remaining cool and firm, ready for any reaction to your statement.

No. 6. Criticism of coming out

The idea of coming out is usually criticized by homophobic communities and anti-gay activists. For example, the Christian organization Exodus International, which even instituted a "National Day Out of Homosexuality" in conjunction with the "National Day of Coming Out." In 2013, the organization ceased its activities. And its former leader has made an official apology to the representatives of the LGBT community, admitting that it is impossible to change sexual orientation.

The feminist community has an ambiguous attitude towards coming out. In particular, the queer feminist Judith Butler in her article "Imitation and Gender Insubordination" argues that the very gesture of revealing a secret is, as it were, a recognition of one's otherness and exclusion from society. Thus, the person who comes out, according to Butler, seems to support that we live in a society where only heterosexual relationships are normal.

No. 7. Coming out symbolism

American artist Keith Haring created the official coming out emblem. This is a picture of a door and a man leaving it. The unspoken anthem of coming out is the Diana Ross song "I" m coming out ".

Shot from the movie "Starship Troopers"

Still from the film "Show Winners"

Still from the movie "Wilde"

Shot from the movie "Super"

Still from the movie "Star Trek: Retribution"

Still from the movie "Elysium - Heaven Not on Earth"

A scene from the movie "The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey"

Shot from the movie "Little Manhattan"

A scene from the film "Perfume: The Story of a Murderer"

Shot from the film "Prisoners"

Promotional frame for the series "Escape"

Still from the movie "Best Friend's Wedding"

Promotional frame for the TV series "Ellie McBeal"

The coming out process

Awareness of one's own orientation

Psychological and social problems of coming out

Parents' attitude towards coming out

National coming out day

History

Symbols and attributes

Support

Celebrity coming out

Ballet dancers

Musicians, singers

Actors

Designers

Politicians

Journalists and TV presenters

Writers

Athletes

Social relevance and influence

Coming out theme in works of art

Criticism

Feminist criticism

Notes (edit)

How to come out?

The coming out process

Awareness of one's own orientation

Psychological and social problems of coming out

Parents' attitude towards coming out

National coming out day

History

Symbols and attributes

Support

Celebrity coming out

Ballet dancers

Musicians, singers

Actors

Designers

Politicians

Journalists and TV presenters

Writers

Athletes

Social relevance and influence

Coming out theme in works of art

Criticism

Feminist criticism

Notes (edit)

# 1. What is coming out?

# 2. Loudest coming-outs

No. 3. What is the point of coming out?

No. 4. Outing or violent coming out

No. 5. How to correctly come out

No. 6. Criticism of coming out

No. 7. Coming out symbolism

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