In this article, I will continue the topic of a specific category of "men" and tell you who is henpecked ...
henpecked- this is the one who creeps / bends in front of girls / women.
Like a boy, like a man, henpecked, in other words, this is a woman's litter =)
As it should be: a woman does not decide anything. The man decides. As I want - so be it. Dot.
If it’s not so with you, you allow a woman to make decisions, you are not the main one in a relationship.
This is only with weak men, women can do this, climb out headlong, show their tantrums, point out, push around, manipulate, order, decide for a man, etc., etc.
Remember: if a woman is trying to push around, manipulate, decide for a man, tell him what and how = and he obeys hey, bends, creeps, then this is henpecked.
Under. Heels. Who? Who wears heels? That's right - women 🙂 that's all.
This fu-fu behavior = not worthy of a man a priori. Immediately says that the man is weak.
The man is responsible. Not a woman. Understand? The man is the one who takes on the masculine functions. If men's functions are performed not by you, but by your woman = then you have problems.
Such men have low self-esteem, they are not confident in themselves, they are afraid of losing their queen, probably problems have been going on since childhood, a strict mother (who decided everything, was the main one - and the boy modeled accordingly, and thinks deep inside - that this is the norm) , weak dad / absence of a dad (as a result, the lack of a correct male model behavior), maybe just the wrong illiterate woman broke him, let's say, domesticated, tamed and made him a heel and much, much more ...
Not one girl / woman = will not interact in a serious way with such a “man”.
They are used to being obeyed, but a strong man doesn’t obey, he decides everything, points out, gives clear instructions, but hey, she doesn’t like it, she’s used to being in charge of her own life, etc., in general, she’s used to being the main one.
Such women are proud, proud, oh oh, in general, in general, they are not ready to be led. It should be.
Respectively, weak men hey, they will, let's say, "like" the fact that they are puppets for her.
Such a woman \u003d can “pacify” and, let’s say, “change”, only very strong man. The question is whether such a girl is worthy of such a strong man and whether he wants to spend his time on her.
There are still such young ladies who want to make a heel out of their man. To do this, they use a bunch-a bunch-a bunch of manipulations so that the step-by-step patsyk becomes obedient, spineless, domesticated, well, in short, he loses himself as a man. This is a terrible category of young ladies, because a woman, on the contrary, should make her man STRONGER and BETTER. And not vice versa.
The advice here is simple: don't let your woman deprive you of your balls. Read on!
That's right - when the man is the main (leading), and the woman is the follower. It is natural.
If these categories of young ladies are not taken into account, then all other girls / women will not seriously interact with such “men” (weak, heels, mattresses, etc.).
As a rule, women check men (do you have balls) and then one of two things, or they use you (they milk you, while they themselves are on the side in search of a man) or immediately just send you off with ends.
Women love strong men. They feel strong men. Women respect strong men, appreciate them, are afraid of losing them, cherish them, flourish before their eyes, etc.
To strong men = women have a completely different behavior. Compliant. Compliant. Etc.
This man can and should bend a woman, indicate hey, give direct instructions, etc. this is normal, because the man is always the main one in the relationship, the man is the leader, and the woman is the follower. But, not vice versa.
If a girl / woman is not ready to be led = you do not need such a girl.
A woman must clearly understand and recognize that the man in the house / relationship is the main one. This, by the way, is one of the properties of an ideal wife, a woman. Ladies, take note.
When a woman, the weaker sex, rules over a man (stronger sex) and is the leader (main) - this is unnatural, not normal, it will not last long, because a normal woman needs a man, a woman wants to obey, obey, etc. her man, inside herself, she does not want to decide anything, what and how, etc. she wants to be strong male shoulder to seem weak and be happy.
If the patsyk bends in front of a woman, the woman immediately feels it, she sees it, as a result: either climbs on her head, starts to do what she wants with you, endure the brain, change, order you, do this, do this, I want that, I want it, get off me, don't appreciate it, don't value it, etc.
In short, all the horror that you are not worthy.
Or the young lady will just immediately tell you goodbye and make ends meet, and this the best way, compared to the previous one… But! And this and that, for you = is not acceptable, so do not be a heel.
How not to become a heel?
Do not bend under a woman. Never. If you don't like something, speak directly. Feel free to say no.
I said "No. Everything. I won't. Do not want. Etc. in the end, if the problem is not solved, drop it and that’s it, you don’t need to adapt, endure, bend something there, etc. there are millions of other women who are ready to be led, not in charge, and I'm sure they are better than your past.
Be a man: The man decides how and what, not the woman.
- Even such trifles, which movie you go to - you decide, not her.
- Where you go to rest - you decide, not her.
- Where you sit is up to you, not her.
- Where you live is up to you, not her.
- And much more, you = responsibility, you are in charge, you are a leader. Everything. Dot.
Believe me, a literate woman is ready to be led - and to obey and obey her man.
Because next to such a man = a woman = will feel safe, protected, will be able to relax and seem “weak”, in short, just be a happy girl.
Hey, you won’t need to grow your own eggs, think about what and how, make difficult decisions, decide everything, be in charge - no, normal girls = don’t want that, they need a strong man, that’s all.
Advice for girls: help your man - reincarnate.
Example: he = what movie are we going to see? You: you are a man - you decide. Here is a good position.
This is the level of literate girls. The vast majority of ala-ulu, who don’t want / can’t / can’t do anything, have only instagram, nails, clothes and travel in their minds, and nothing else, do not develop in any way, like women, do not improve themselves in any way, etc. etc. and relationships are so complicated and serious that it is impossible to convey in words, the vast majority do not understand this all ...
To build a really serious, harmonious and happy relationship = a man and a woman must be equal to each other, strong link + strong link = success.
In general, no one is born a man, but becomes - become, work on yourself.
Appreciate yourself. Respect yourself. Love yourself. Pump yourself up like a man and you will notice how women will run after you in herds - and you will already choose with whom you will be or not be, who you like and who you don’t. And not to endure any woman's garbage, tantrums, brainwashing, fulfill her desires and demands, creep, bend, humiliate, etc. The woman does not decide anything.
You are the man and you decide everything. As you wish, so be it. With whom you want - with that you will be. Etc. You. Everything. You decide. Dot! That's all for me. More articles in the section
Regards, administrator.
Anything happens. Sometimes a man is weak, and then a woman is forced to take control. It happens that a woman is a commander by nature. She wants to be the first in everything and always. And then she deliberately tries to subdue the man to her will. If a man is weak in character, she easily succeeds. And if not? Sometimes it still works out. He yields to her because he loves, and then she, as they say, "sits on her neck."
What to do in order not to fall under the heel? If a wife is striving for power from the very beginning, you need to show firmness, make yourself respected. You should not indulge her in everything. Treat her like a spoiled child. At the beginning life together show that you are the one who makes the final decisions (I'm not talking about tyranny, decisions should be reasonable). And no tears, tantrums and screams will help, but only reasonable arguments will help. Any normal woman(without deviations in the psyche) actually subconsciously wants her man to be stronger than her, even if he declares the opposite. Over time, she will come to terms and will be secretly proud that she has such a husband.
What if the situation is different? They are roughly equal. None of them dream of dominance. But somehow it turns out that the wife becomes the main one. As in any team, the family usually has a leader. He either puts forward himself, or manifests himself in the course of performing some tasks.
Suppose you need to make repairs in the apartment. The wife, who does not aspire to become a leader, gently hints: “Kolenka, maybe we can make repairs?”, Expecting that some actions will follow from his side at least in a week or two. And Kolenka is broken, he is lying on a soft sofa with a laptop, and he does not want to get up, run somewhere, do something, and even more so, repair is by no means included in the list of his main priorities, because it does not drip from the ceiling, the pipes do not leak, and the color of the wallpaper does not matter to him. Kolenka absent-mindedly says "Uh-huh" and safely forgets about this conversation.
After a while, the wife again softly hints with the same result, after a while it’s not very soft, and then, having lost her patience, she says: “So, Kolya, we’ve been doing repairs since Monday!” Kolya frowns with displeasure, but makes repairs under the strict guidance of his wife, who does not allow him to slip away to the sofa at the first opportunity. During the renovation, she is the leader. The husband thinks something like: "You need it - you do it." Next comes the purchase of furniture. With the same result. The wife gradually gets a taste, acquires competencies (the word is now fashionable). And the husband gives up. The wife is still trying to somehow stir him up, but she believes more and more in the principle “While you wait from him, it’s easier to do it yourself.”
After a while, the wife begins to feel like a heroine. That's how much she did, how much she can do, it's all her merit. And the husband notices that it is not profitable to resist: it’s easier for him, let his wife have a headache. Sometimes he rebels, but momentary indignation is one thing, and daily responsibility is another. Yes, self-esteem suffers, yes, he feels unnecessary, unhappy, “not a man”, but it is becoming more and more difficult to tear real estate from the sofa.
Years go by, the wife takes on more and more new tasks. The "nimbus" begins to tangibly press, she begins to curse her husband, they say, there is no sense in him, everything is on her shoulders, all her life ... And he at least once ... And she is so unhappy ... But it is no longer possible to switch roles. My husband's organ for making household decisions and responsibility has atrophied. And the wife has knowledge and conditioned reflexes, and most importantly, the principle of "it's easier to do it yourself." The husband is afraid of his wife, the wife in her heart despises her husband. Who benefits from this?
What to do in order not to fall under the heel? If a woman does not seek power, do not let her empirically come to the conviction "it's easier to do it yourself." Do not dismiss, help, participate, take the initiative. From the very beginning, do not become a “sofa vegetable” in the family with big time response and low utility. Then it will not work to replay the situation.
Dear women, I appeal to you. Well, do not rush you to power in the family! At work - please, in the company - please. assert yourself there. And at home you will experience much more happiness if you can respect your man until the end of your life, rely on him, be proud of him. Ask, don't order. Persuade, don't force. Don't make both of you unhappy.
To recognize henpecked, you need to try quite a bit. For example, listen to the closest relatives, friends and acquaintances about his weaker half. Very often the following is said about such a woman: “She is the head of the family, she does everything herself, she does not expect any help from him, because she understands everything better. And he only agrees and sometimes timidly objects, but he knows it’s useless, he’s just under her heel.
The most common type of henpecked is a man crushed by an emancipated woman. Hiding behind her success, he is a weak, underdeveloped personality, a loser and a weakling. These men live with constant feeling guilt and understand that they did not take place in life, while they are content with any indulgence on the part of their woman. Very rarely, dreaming of freedom, secretly from his wife, he drinks a bottle of beer or meets a friend for 10 minutes. The wife, in turn, uses only him physical abilities, believing that the rest she has in abundance.
A man is a clear henpecked person, if he prefers never to argue with his woman, swallows public criticism from her and all kinds of verbal attacks against him. Very often he has only pocket money. He is not able not only to compose his own, but also to buy any of the necessary things, because. The wife manages the family money. He can't afford a voice, sometimes not even knowing where his toolbox or documents are.
Another type of henpecked is characterized by a fairly high intelligence. A representative of this species tries not to discuss everyday problems with a woman and always agrees in everything, simply shifting all the difficulties that arise onto the shoulders of his wife. Most often these are writers, scientists, for whom it is very important full immersion in your favorite business. All other worries are of little concern to him. As a rule, for him there is a well-defined scale of values: a well-kept house, a traditional family, quiet children, food served on time and bought and. All this should go on as usual, without conflicts and other complications. But, if suddenly some “excesses” are made on the part of the wife, then he begins to point out her wrong “behavior” and tries to put her in her “place”, because. He considers himself an established strong and intelligent person. This type of henpecked clearly outlines the boundaries of the wife's behavior and will not tolerate their violation.
The next species is a creature with the psychology of a slave. It endures any humiliation and shame. A very pathetic person. He lives in constant expectation that his woman will do all his affairs for him and solve problems.
Perhaps men, having familiarized themselves with these characteristics, will be very surprised or even offended. However, those of them who sincerely love and adore their woman have tried and will try to do everything to please her, even if for some reason they fit the description of a henpecked man. The main thing is that a man should have self-respect and love his soul mate. Any woman will appreciate this, and in the end, next to her will be exactly the man she deserves.
The etymology of the word "henpecked", it would seem, is obvious: "one who is under the heel." Since heels are most often worn by women, and the concept of "henpecked" is used exclusively in the masculine gender, we can conclude that this term describes the humiliated and subordinate position of a man in relations with a woman. In fact, it used to be the name of hunting falcons, which were put on hoods (special caps) to calm them down. However, over time, the concept completely moved into the sphere of family relations.
Henpecked explicit and hidden
Throughout the history of Russia and Europe, views on family life were purely patriarchal. The man was considered the head of the family, solely responsible for making decisions and the main earner. The ideas of women's equality were born relatively recently, so many people are still not able to accept the fact that a woman can also make decisions and be responsible for them. Based on this, such people call henpecked not only those men who completely obeyed their companions, but simply those who, on the basis of equal rights and duties.
In the classical sense, a henpecked man is a weak-willed male who, for one reason or another, is not able to defend his point of view, which means that he is forced to agree with his girlfriend or wife in everything. Henpecked people often become people who have not reached any significant heights in life. Failure in everyday matters becomes an additional argument that allows the companion of such a man to disparage both himself and his point of view on a particular significant issue.
In addition to the obvious dominance of a woman over a man, arising from a more aggressive or simply active life position representatives of the fair sex, there are situations in which a man, formally considered the head of the family, is in fact a victim of skillful manipulation. With the help of tears, flattery, threats or cunning, a woman forces her companion to do as she wishes. In some cases, a man is completely confident that he makes decisions on his own, although in fact he is entirely dependent on the opinion of his “half”.
Weakness or concessions?
Finally, there are “voluntary” henpecked people, that is, people who, in exchange for family well-being and home comfort, give up part of their views, for example, on domestic issues. The difference between this type of men and the real ones is that they clearly divide spheres of influence, not allowing women to enter “their” territory, in exchange for concessions that are insignificant, from their point of view. As a rule, such a refusal not only allows a woman to feel like a full member of the family, but also saves her from many unpleasant situations and conflicts.
Do not confuse a man capable of compromises and concessions with a weak-willed and sluggish henpecked. After all, the ability to accept someone else's point of view or admit one's own wrong is evidence of maturity and masculinity, not weakness at all.
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In the last article, we talked about what are the rules of a happy relationship. Today I will tell you how to get out from under the female heel, who is henpecked and how not to become henpecked.
Have you ever had a friend's phone ring in a bar and you hear these annoying words: “Yes, zai, I saw the time. Okay, I'm leaving now. Yes, I will buy, which ones? I'll be there soon, kiss you". Do you remember the expression on the face of the whole company at that moment?
And then he says that it's time for him, and does not give in to any persuasion.
How to understand that they make you a pet? Who is a henpecked? And how to get out from under the heel, if you have already got there?
How not to become henpecked and how to get out from under the heel?
If any of what I write is about you, then you're already under the heel!
A henpecked man is a man who allows a woman to make decisions. When you get married, do you need to make repairs, in the summer we will go to Yalta, and it's time to throw your sweater away. She thinks about everything and decides for both of you, and you only have your job. At home you are a woman with a beard.
A henpecked person is one who does not take on male functions. They are performed by the wife, which means you can relax and unwind, right? She will solve all the problems herself. In principle, I am not against Yalta. And the repair is her idea, let her do it, I didn’t get involved in it. Is that how you talk?
Hence the instructions from her what to do. If you yourself stopped to decide! If your eggs have become small, like a mouse! How did the girl's balls become!
Yes, these are signs of a status young lady, but this particular one will never come to terms with the role of a follower. She is used to managing, and will do so in all areas of life. And the man nearby will be a puppet, will carry slippers in the morning and fuck only on command.
Any normal girl (without mental disorders) really wants her man to be stronger than her. This will give her the opportunity not to be afraid for the future, to stop making decisions, not to bear responsibility. To be a girl, in short.
Even if she says otherwise, a strong male alpha, male leader will subdue her. She will obey because it is normal and natural. If you can demonstrate to her that of the two of you, you are the man. And she will feel what it's like to be a complete woman next to you.
3. How do men get henpecked?
Basically, these are weak men. Those who are used to the fact that everything is decided by a woman. Usually it's mom. Those who grew up in a family and saw that mom is more important than dad. These are those for whom my mother wrote a resume and took her to work. Who does she remind to put on a scarf, pay a communal apartment, eat on time and almost take a shit.
He will think that everything is in order, that this is the norm. And in a relationship, it will not be surprised if a woman begins to manage everything.
It can also be a normal man who has a core, but whom the woman broke, relaxed and stuffed.
He may have been capable of being held responsible initially, but contacted strong woman. Next to her, he realized that she herself could do anything. That she copes with both male and female roles.
Why stress? You can also lie on the couch and drive to the pillbox, everything has already been done and controlled. Such women spoil normal men. Make sure this doesn't happen to you!
4. Women's position, how to make a man henpecked.
Before writing the article, I got into Google and looked for what young ladies write on the topic of henpecked. I even found a couple of articles on how they supposedly program these henpecked people.
If she has chosen a man from the two types described above, ropes can be twisted from him. And they know how to do it, you won't even notice the leash around your neck.
She will quarrel if you refuse to comply with her requests. She will offer solutions to problems herself and not wait for your word. She will say the phrase "I'm a girl" when it suits her.
Most likely, she will still try to isolate you from friends, who will notice that they are trying hard to take you down with a shoe. And he will apply a bunch of manipulations so that you gradually become obedient and eggless domesticated, in short.
5. How to stop being henpecked?
Grow those eggs! Be a man! In all understandings. Be a leader, make decisions. Take full responsibility for the consequences of wrong decisions.
Perform male functions and make sure that your woman does not take them. So that she does not have to take them on, which is the most important thing. Do not let her empirically come to the conclusion that it is easier to do it yourself than to wait for decisive action from you. This is a very common case.
Do not become a sofa knight, develop, set goals, achieve! Let the girl next to you remain a girl. And give her the opportunity. To do this, leave her feminine duties, let her feel safe.
Let her know that you will decide, you will earn, you will figure it out. You will see how it will bloom next to you. And how her pride in you will inspire you.
