Emotional stability is the key to peace of mind. Why do you need emotional stability?

The modern rhythm of life is not only exhausting physically, but also psychologically. Great amount of people suffers from emotional instability, often breaks down for no reason, cries and falls into hysterics. There is actionable recommendations, which will normalize the psychological state.

Experts say that each person can create a certain shield around him that will protect him from negativity and help him move through life confidently and with a smile.

1. It is important to find the so-called weak link that causes. Someone is suffering from bad relationship in the family or at work. In this case, all you need to do possible ways to eliminate this annoying factor. Many people suffer from lack of time. Psychologists recommend that they make a detailed schedule for each day, which will save a lot of time.
2. To become emotionally stable, you need to constantly work on yourself. Experts recommend in a calm environment to understand what is missing to achieve, for example, it may be worth learning foreign language or develop thinking. The right investment in yourself will allow you to feel more confident in life and not react to irritants.
3. Important advice how to become emotionally stable - agree with your inner self. Psychologists recommend learning to turn off negative and wrong thoughts in your head. Many people suffer from constant thoughts about any negative situations. It is worth learning to switch to something good and useful.

It is necessary to correctly respond to failures and take them as a recommendation to find new ways to move forward. important to be whole person which no problem can harm.

Modern reality leaves a certain imprint on the psyche of people. We become increasingly irritable, angry, unbalanced and emotionally unstable. Stop reacting to unpleasant situations does not mean becoming insensitive. Psychological resilience is trained in the same way as physical strength. This is a gradual and systematic process, to which you need to make certain efforts, and strive to become a balanced and wise person.

Development of emotional stability: stages of formation

Psychologists compare the emotional stability of a person with a shield that protects against negativity and evil. It helps to reduce the negative on the person.

There are a few rules to follow to become an emotionally stable person:

Stop and concentrate.

Undoubtedly, each of us felt this way, and makes it impossible to think rationally. This applies equally to both positive and negative emotions.

Do not dwell on how your body reacted to an external stimulus. If you have a rapid heartbeat or perspiration, then the manifestations will only become stronger if you focus on them;
Don't follow a general pattern. Do not model for yourself the development of a particular situation. The minute the brain receives a signal about the occurrence of a stimulus, it causes the body to react as programmed in advance. Therefore, do not respond to irritation at the same second. Stop, count slowly to ten, and begin to form a new pattern of behavior;
Watch your own behavior. This will help remove unnecessary reactions that have become habitual. A person's reaction to an external stimulus consists of a set of reactions to several information flows from various organs feelings. By focusing your attention on what you are now feeling and hearing, you will save yourself from a surge of unnecessary stereotyped emotion.

At the moment when you react to a stimulus, your body responds accordingly - it trembles, it is doused with cold or heat, sweats, muscles tense up, the pulse quickens, breathing becomes intermittent, etc. These sensations occur at the moment when, under the influence of stress, the sympathetic nervous system releases a huge amount of activating hormones into the blood. These include the well-known adrenaline. Take a deep breath, then the same exhale. Continue until you realize that the tension is receding.

Use belly breathing. You should feel that when you take a deep breath, the muscles of your abdomen diverge from tension;
Place one hand on chest, the other on the stomach. It does not matter in what position you will do this exercise (sitting, lying or standing), the main thing is to straighten your back. Inhale air long and slowly through your nose, then exhale it just as long through pursed lips. At least six such breaths should be taken per minute;
Focus on these exercises to take your mind off the problem.

Smiling is one of the manifestations that a person experiences. Smile and you will cheer yourself up.

If you smile, you feel better. Stand in front of a mirror and smile at yourself. But don't just do it with your lips. Engage in this process all the muscles of the face, and especially the eyes. Does not work? Then make faces, it will surely cause not only a smile, but also laughter.

Imagination.

By turning on your imagination, you can find for yourself that quiet and safe place where adversity and misfortune will pass you by. By training the imagination, a person is able to greatly simplify his own attitude to life.

The emotional stability of a person begins with the fact that a person ceases to feel in danger. Look for the safest place for yourself, where troubles and hardships will pass you by. If there is none in real life, come up with it for yourself - the azure seashore, Mountain peak, a boat in the middle of the quiet surface of the lake, etc .;
Now make sure no one bothers you. To do this, choose a place and time where no one will disturb you. You only need a few minutes to be alone with yourself;
Sit comfortably in a chair or sofa. Take the position in which you feel comfortable.

What does he look like? What do you feel there? What does it smell like and what sounds do you like the most?

Regain your breath, relax. If you don't succeed the first time, don't blame yourself. and anxiety may appear. Try again, and you will definitely succeed;
Try to imagine each negative emotion in the form of a certain object, phenomenon or animal. Imagine that . Without an influx of oxygen, it will not be able to burn, so “cover it with a glass cap” and watch how the flame goes out. Or imagine that stress is an annoying mouse that spends the night under the floor and disturbs your sleep. Let the "cat-savior" into the room, which will quickly deal with the rodent, and free you from emotional worries.

Learn to manage stress.

In a state of stress, it is difficult for a person to manage their emotions. It is impossible to avoid them, but managing stress is a whole science. There are several ways to help calm down and relieve yourself of stress:

A few deep breaths and long exhalations will help you calm down and begin to perceive the situation adequately;
Mentally count to ten slowly to give yourself time to concentrate on the problem;
Take a time out and step back from the problem for a few minutes, then come back and tackle it with renewed vigor.

Turn off cognitive distortions.

These are certain patterns of behavior that have formed in a person’s head, like standard reactions to certain stimuli. It happens that these models can work simultaneously, which leads to an overload of feelings and emotions. If you learn to recognize and eliminate cognitive distortions, you will free yourself from unnecessary experiences.

Constant premonition of catastrophe (catastrophism).

This is a state when a person “inflates” every event to the size of an irreparable catastrophe. When you go so far in your thoughts that you no longer rely on real facts for a long time, but only feel how the horror grows from all the new “details” that your imagination draws to you. This leads to the fact that you experience several negative emotions at once: anger, sadness, longing, irritation, etc.

You call your husband, and he does not answer the phone for a while. Five minutes later, you try again - the result is the same. In your soul: “It cannot be that he does not answer my calls! So he was angry with me for something. For what? What did I say or do wrong? Maybe he found another who is smarter and more obedient than me? What to do"?
Reassure yourself in every incomprehensible situation that reflections should be based on facts. Don't let your thoughts cling to speculation and conjecture. Do not build chains on what has not been proven. If he doesn't answer, it means he's busy. And about the offense and the presence in the life of the husband of another woman, you need to ask him himself.

Overgeneralization or "all in one heap".

People who try to find a connection between facts that have nothing in common suffer from such an assessment of the situation.

you passed difficult interview and you were denied a job. Many in a similar situation do not despair, and continue to look for work. But there are those who tend to be selfish and think that his failure is directly related to the "curse" that a neighbor placed on him, or the fact that he is a failure in life. And from this it follows that he will never find a job;
If you notice a similar train of thought behind you, do not despair, it is fixable! Find evidence that you are a failure. Yes, you do not have a decent job today, because there was a reduction in staff at the old duty station, and you fell under it. Maybe you are not suitable for a company in which the level of knowledge or appearance. There are two options for correcting the situation: you find a problem, get rid of it and try again to pass an interview, or you go to another company, successfully pass this stage, and get a highly paid and interesting work. Conclusion - one failure cannot be a pattern. It so happens that in the life of every person there can be “black stripes”.

extremes.

There is a category of people that divides the world into "white" and "black". There are no halftones for them. Either everything has to be perfect, or they don't need anything at all! Such a position is contrary to all laws of common sense. By making excessive demands on himself, a person will only achieve that he will be aware of his uselessness and worthlessness. This will end in a state of deep depression.

You are sitting on strict diet. However, it turns out that you find yourself with your boyfriend in a cafe and eat a cake. Realizing that you violated the diet, you accuse yourself of weakness, worthlessness and give up. You think that now you will eat everything and get fat, since you could not do such a small thing for yourself;
Stop berating yourself! Imagine that your friend ate this cake. Would you condemn her for this "terrible offense"? Of course not! No achievement is easy for a person. On the way to the fulfillment of desires, they put a lot of effort. Force yourself to go back to your diet and get back into rhythm. healthy lifestyle life.

Open up to the world.

The formation of emotional stability begins with the fact that a person learns not to be afraid of the world and the people around.

Emotionally closed people do not get a complete picture of such feelings as love, trust, friendship, mutual understanding, etc.;
Don't become a perfectionist. This concept has nothing to do with ambition and the desire for self-development. It forces you to demand the unattainable from yourself in order to prove to others your worth. Open people they are not afraid, they easily experience failures, quickly recover from them, and continue to go towards their intended goal.

To develop emotional stability in yourself, decide whether your life beliefs are firm or you are vacillating. This will help you maintain a sense of self-confidence in those moments when you need to defend your point of view.

Coping with stress is much easier when a child is emotionally stable. To achieve the required balance, parents must adhere to the following rules.

Take time to listen

When you take the time to talk with your child and listen to him, it makes the baby more emotionally resilient. Do you know what tactics active listening liberates a teenager and makes him more open? He realizes that his mother is not indifferent to his life, and begins to share his most intimate experiences more willingly. Set aside 10 minutes for heart-to-heart talk at the end of each day. Ask about problems interacting with friends, fears, worries, or situations that could lead to anger. Tell us how to deal with social failures and how to put up with disappointments, share own stories from childhood.

Children should be involved in the problem solving process

When parents are overprotective of their child, they get to the point where they can do the hard part. homework or do it for a child design work. This will not benefit the baby, because when he is left alone with the problem, he will droop and drop his hands. An alternative to overprotection is the desire to give the child more powers. Even if the baby encounters some difficulties in completing tasks, do not rush to do everything for him. First ask if the child has any ideas that could help find a solution. Unfortunately, parents rarely offer cooperation, citing lack of time, it is easier for them to do it on their own.

Stimulate growth mindset

Research shows that there are two types of mindset: the fixed mindset and the growth mindset. In the first case, the child initially knows that he is "intelligent" or "not capable of learning", and he carries this model throughout his school life. That is why C students do not want to go out of their way, because they are sure that they will not be able to improve their results. In the second case, children know that success comes with hard work and is proportional to the effort put in. They know how to accept any failure philosophically, realizing that mistakes and failures are an integral part of unique experience. Wherein emotional stability these children is very high. They are not afraid to tell their parents about deuces and do everything to correct a bad grade.

Fixed mindset leads to unsettling pressure where every failure is another confirmation low level intellect. This completely discourages the student's desire to learn and deprives him of prospects. Growth mindset, on the other hand, generates motivation to improve results and is powerful way mind training. Intelligence can be likened to muscles that get stronger and stronger when used more often.

Emotional vocabulary

Every parent wants their child to show emotional intellect and knew how to share his own experiences intelligibly. Work on magnification vocabulary. The more evaluative definitions expressing the emotional state that the baby will use, the better. Let him not hesitate to say how immensely happy he is, why he is angry, or what made him upset. Thus, he will learn not only to distinguish feelings and emotions, but also to describe them better.

Don't be zealous with praise

Praise is comparable to oxygen, but inordinate amounts can demotivate a child. It is important to keep track of which factors you prefer to evaluate and highlight. It is believed that intelligence is given to a child by nature, so you should not praise him for being smart. But the efforts made on the way to achieving success are the merit of the student himself, so they should be appreciated. Parents who don't skimp on praise and focus on the smallest accomplishments of their child will be interested to know that excessive praise contributes to the growth of narcissistic qualities.

Avoid Abuse

When parents not only seek to provide the child with everything necessary, but openly pamper him, this has devastating consequences for the psyche of the baby. Research shows that spoiled children, as adults, experience certain problems with self-esteem, trust and love. Some experts believe that pampering is a peculiar form of child neglect. Via expensive gifts, pocket money and toys parents compensate for the lack of love and attention.

However, such a model of interaction deprives the child of the opportunity to form important skills which will be useful in adult life. Children should know that wealth do not fall from the sky, they must be earned by hard work. They also need to know that you can’t always get everything you want, and sometimes you have to put up with disappointment.

Teach the Principles of Mutual Aid

To take an old woman across the street, to bring medicine to a sick grandmother, or to try to lift a kitten from a tree - all these simple truths teach children to care and help each other. Instruct the older children to read to the little ones before going to bed, give feasible assignments in the garden. Community service should not be seen by teenagers as another chance to win the praise of teachers. It's good when a child perceives this as a unique chance to ennoble the school grounds and make their own contribution to the improvement.

Beware of criticism

Many parents think that criticism can be helpful, but it is not. When you point out the shortcomings or miscalculations of the child, it causes nothing in him but anger and anger. He becomes brash in response, becomes rude and irreverent. Such impudent behavior cannot go unnoticed by parents, and they send a second wave of criticism towards the unlucky teenager. This time they don't like impudence and rudeness. Be patient and try to respectfully listen to the story of the reasons that led to the failure.

Emotion management

Parents must have the skills of negotiators, but for this it is worth learning how to adequately respond to children's emotions. When the child is upset, the mother immediately pesters him with questions. She does it from good intentions seeking to protect and relieve pain with advice. However, instead of asking the child why he is so upset, ask how you can help to solve the situation? Tell him that sometimes people have to put up with sadness and teach him to recognize emotions on the faces of loved ones.

With scientific point view of psychological stability is interpreted as the ability of the individual to function adequately under the pressure of adverse conditions. Esotericists believe that psychological stability is the fulfillment of one's karmic tasks in life. You can choose any point of view. Exist effective methods for the development of psychological stability in their character.

rationalization method

This method is based on the fact that it is necessary to consciously change your attitude to the situation. In this case, the situation becomes less traumatic for a person. Most conflicts can be resolved by your efforts. You can not direct the conflict inward, as this can resolve your internal energy. In order to master this method, it is necessary to reduce emotional coloring an event that happened to you. Turn off emotional background. Give yourself the installation "it's good that ...". Watch your speech, even in your thoughts do not say "it's a pity that ...", "how could this happen." If you are already in, then think not about him, but how to resolve the situation.

Switching method

The ability to switch in time is a great gift. Most often, we dig into our emotions and begin to analyze what has already happened. This happens especially often if the situation is protracted. Switch to what you love. It could be your favorite hobby, meeting up with friends. Spending time with friends, laughter and humor helps a lot. The main thing in this case- get positive emotions and get rid of the negative.

Catharsis method

Catharsis is a spiritual cleansing of the body, a way to neutralize negative emotions. Catharsis was used more than two centuries ago by Aristotle himself. Catharsis was actively used in psychotherapy for the treatment of neuroses. AT modern understanding catharsis can be seen as a soulful conversation with girlfriends. You should not experience troubles alone, as not everyone can cope with the problems that have piled up. It is better to talk with a loved one.

Method of "paper complaints"

This method is used by many since childhood, but is often forgotten over the years. Almost every person in childhood had a diary in which we wrote our experiences and problems. In adulthood, putting your thoughts on paper will help you understand yourself and solve the problem. Keep a notebook in which you will record your thoughts during the conflict. When you write everything you think is necessary on paper, reread it later and add the right information. You can also write an action plan.

All methods are good, but the main thing to remember is that there are no unsolvable situations. In most cases, an optimal solution can be found. It all depends on your efforts and ability to be psychologically stable.